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The Seven Deadly Sins of the Glenelg Football Club

PostPosted: Sat Jan 27, 2007 12:25 pm
by Rik E Boy
It has to be one of the great mysteries of South Australian football.

Tell me, why do people bother barracking for the Tigers? Consider the negatives..or the seven deadly sins of the Glenelg Football Club.

1. This club lost it's first 56 matches. This is why Glenelg supporters will have a crack at Norwood and South Adelaide for winning 'meaningless' premierships in the early years in the league..it helps them forget their own lametable entry into the competition.

2. Giving Port Adelaide a leg up. A time honoured SA tradition is a visceral hatred of the Port Adelaide football club, yes, because the bastards kept winning premierships. Glenelg has been the villians on Grand Final day in 1977,1981,1988,1990 and 1992. Port have hammered out a reputation of winning premierships when they might not have been the best team of that year and on many occasions, it has been at the expense of Glenelg. Surely the Tigers could have gotten us all home at least once?

3. That Richmond strip. Erk! Say no more. Even Torrens didn't persist with a yellow streak.

4. Graham Studley Cornes. This self appointed Yoda of South Australian football is considered a guru..by himself. Cornes, the champion of winning arguments by cutting off callers on 'his' radio show, is a man who is always right..which is just wrong. A famous Cornesism is 'What have Norwood done since the second World War?', the answer is of course is win three more premierships than Glenelg have won in their entire history. The lineage has continued into the AFL age with his sons playing for the Port Adelaide football club, giving most of us a quiet chuckle along the way. These days Cornes would get lost if he was ever to venture out to Brighton road and probably end up at West Lakes or the 5aa studios.

5. Four Flags. BWAHAHAHAHA. Yep, this 'glamour club' has won just four premierships since 1921 In the early years, it was a battle, then the Tiges broke through for a premiership against Port in 1934, which satisfied them to the point of never needing to repeat the dose to the Magpies. However, by the late 1960's Glenelg was a powerhouse in the league that had an endless list of champion players. The result were flags in 1973 and the back to back effort of 1985-86. Despite the fact that this club should have won about ten flags by now, many Glenelg supporters will see fit to sledge Sturt, North and Central fans even though these clubs have left them behind in terms of the ultimate triumph. Quit while you are behind gentlemen.

6. Bonehead McDermott. Bone has made as many South Australians cringe as KG Cunningham, despite the fact the venerable channel nine broadcaster has had several decades head start. If you can't make any sense Chris, please at least buy some decent shirts! Perhaps this is a little unkind on McDermott, who was gutsy player in his day. Today he is a well balanced indvidual..he has a chip on both shoulders and still spits on the footpath anytime mentions the name 'Malcolm Blight'.

7. Hail the mighty Adelaide Crowtigers! When the Crows first began, many South Australians cheered them on as they flogged Hawthorn who had that idiot Dermott Brereton playing for them. Before too long though people started thinking..hang on, I'm not following bloody Glenelg! Coached by Cornes, this side had more Tigers than a Malaysian whorehouse and knowlegeable football fans stayed away in their droves. Grandmas, Housewives and kids disillusioned by the music scene by Mini Vinilli and MC Hammer decided to support this newfangled 'team for all South Australians' in something called the AFL. The end result is that Crow fans are rightly lambasted nationwide as the least knowledgeable in the game and our local league has taken a mighty blow from which it will never recover. Of course, this is all Glenelg's fault.

So the next time there is talk of an eight team competition, forget about the Bluelegs or a monster club in the North. It's pretty clear which cylinder has not been firing. Perhaps the Bloods or the Panthers could lower themselves to join up with the Tigers so we could continue to have such a humourous entity within the leagues' ranks to provide character.

Ah, Glenelg football club...thanks for the memories...and the premierships! :wink:

regards,

REB

PostPosted: Sat Jan 27, 2007 12:36 pm
by westside
Very good.

PostPosted: Sat Jan 27, 2007 1:00 pm
by Punk Rooster
:prayer: :prayer: :prayer:

PostPosted: Sat Jan 27, 2007 1:02 pm
by TroyGFC
:butthead:

PostPosted: Sat Jan 27, 2007 1:21 pm
by bayman
to be fair some valid comments but not all of it valid, i'll elaborate later as i 'have to play' cricket with little bayman

PostPosted: Sat Jan 27, 2007 1:53 pm
by Dutchy
Eat a bitter banana this morning REB? or does this still hurt -

Image

8)

PostPosted: Sat Jan 27, 2007 2:05 pm
by Snaggletooth Tiger
I gotta admit REB...
You DO make some valid points there! (Sad but true) :-k
But my question is...
Is Glenelg Football Club the favourite whipping boy of the majority of SAfooty posters?
Not a week goes by without somebody starting up a thread bagging the Bays!
All I can say is "BRING IT ON!!!!" :finga:
I enjoy constructive criticism, even the smart-arse crap...
As long as it has merit & not just stupid braindead comments like 'Glenelg Suck!!' or the like! :roll:

PostPosted: Sat Jan 27, 2007 2:09 pm
by Mr66
Hey REB, better inform Dutchy about the GFs of 1950,1975&1982.
Isn't it fun when one particular club is singled out by a post like this?
The only point I have to disgree with is the guernsey which I always
thought looked better than Richmond ie, sashless back and one less
gold hoop on the socks.
Ditto with South & West who looked better than Carlton & Essendon.

PostPosted: Sat Jan 27, 2007 2:15 pm
by Dutchy
Mr66 wrote:Hey REB, better inform Dutchy about the GFs of 1950,1975&1982.


Cant do it yourself? :?

PostPosted: Sat Jan 27, 2007 2:31 pm
by bayman
1, 56 games =correct, as for meaningless premierships who said that ? i certainly haven't & i think whether they are in 1888 or 2188 they all count for the same
2, to get 'us' all home once= doesn't 1934 count ? (as i said they all count equally)
3, i/we like the jumper as it is a FOOTY jumper unlike some going around today
4, tough but not totally wrong but he does go to brighton road games
5, correct
6, since he missed the coaching gig in 1997 he is very critical of glenelg more so than you think
7, an 8 team comp !! well we have financial security so it will not happen as for your mob how are they going financially ?? yeah maybe they'll be merging first

8, just go down to the parade & have a caffe latte` & drown your inferiority complex

PostPosted: Sat Jan 27, 2007 3:15 pm
by Dutchy
bayman wrote:
8, just go down to the parade & have a caffe latte` & drown your inferiority complex


He cant, doesnt even live in the state...and hasnt caught up with the news that KG hasnt been with Channel 9 for 2 years... :lol:

PostPosted: Sat Jan 27, 2007 3:20 pm
by mighty_tiger_79
thats very disappointing in that you only found SEVEN DEADLY SINS, what about the rest?????

PostPosted: Sat Jan 27, 2007 4:15 pm
by Barto
That was a thing of beauty. I can't find any holes in any of the points put forth.

This had me laughing out loud:

A famous Cornesism is 'What have Norwood done since the second World War?', the answer is of course is win three more premierships than Glenelg have won in their entire history. The lineage has continued into the AFL age with his sons playing for the Port Adelaide football club, giving most of us a quiet chuckle along the way.

PostPosted: Sat Jan 27, 2007 4:19 pm
by blueandwhite
REB, thankyou for bringing some well researched, factual and well articulated points to this forum.

PostPosted: Sat Jan 27, 2007 5:49 pm
by redden whites
REB, right on the money mate......a great post

Re: The Seven Deadly Sins of the Glenelg Football Club

PostPosted: Sat Jan 27, 2007 7:20 pm
by Pseudo
Rik E Boy wrote:It has to be one of the great mysteries of South Australian football.

Tell me, why do people bother barracking for the Tigers?


Ahhh REBster, I once asked the same question of myself. It was a miserable winters day, some imaginary number of years ago, and the Bays were trudging head-down off Glenelg Oval after another solid pants-down belting. Questions of "why do I follow the Bays?" rapidly devolved into "why do I exist?" and "what's the meaning of it all?", becoming more and more intense with every sip of overpriced draught and with every hackneyed excuse given in BH's after-match speech.

Falling rapidly into my own personal existential dichotomy, I grabbed a few tomes by Jean-Paul Sartre from the bookshelf and headed to the Parade. There I spent several days mooching in cafes, sipping pooncey lattes, expressing my angst at the world in general and striking effeminate poses. After a week of this I realised: I had turned into a Norwood supporter! I bought a pack of cheroots to complete the picture (nod to madcap) and decided to join Norwood there and then. I set off in search of Norwood's clubrooms. That plan failed, for the obvious reason: I discovered that Norwood's clubrooms had an existential crisis far greater than my own.

Dejected, I headed for Unley. Trudging through dogshit as I crossed Unley Oval, my spirits were restored when I caught sight of that vital ingredient: CLUBROOMS! Happily, I marched up to the door and pulled it open, walked up to Jack's Bar and said "I'd like a membership and a pint of draught beer please". "Sorry love", said the lass behind the bar, "we don't sell one of those things here". So I didn't buy a membership either.

I headed South. After three weeks of solid driving I ended up at Noarlunga. It was a mild winters day, about 17 degrees, which meant it was only -40 with the wind chill factor. I trudged shivering to their office and asked for a membership application form. "I'll have to call the printers", replied the staffer. "We only get one of those done each year, and I already sent it off to the other supporter". I realised that South wouldn't be the club for me.

Returning to civilisation some weeks later I swung past Richmond Oval. The journey had filled my bladder so I detoured to the Richmond Oval dunnies prior to the clubrooms. I'm not sure, but I reckon I bumped into the Beaumont children as I groped around in the dark, searching for the trough. Several days later I saw a bright light and headed for it, finally emerging into daylight after subsiding for the last few days on urinal pucks and pisswater. By this time I had cooled on the concept of joining the Bloods, as I realised that all their decent players end up at the Bay anyway.

So I headed up Port Road to the Eagles club. Recent premiers and generally in the upper half of the table, I thought that the Eagles had a lot of merit. However no amount of merit would be enough to eclipse the fashion disaster which is the Eagles' premiership guernsey. On top of which, when the monthly fight broke out between the Woodville faction and the Torrens faction I wouldn't know who to side with. So I moved along.

I thought North Adelaide was a good Prospect (pun most certainly intended) and arrived there with much anticipation. It was a great great club and a club I could love, the grand ol' red and whites. Unfortunately the office had closed by the time I got there, so I retired to an internet cafe where I hoped to sign up online. As I browsed through the North webpages I stumbled across The Roost, and realised with dismay that I'd never be a North supporter. Bagging the coach, Bagging supporters who bag the coach, Woefully downplaying the teams chances in the coming match, bagging those who downplayed the teams chances in the coming match, bagging the coach again for good measure, threatening to leave for good and never return, bagging those who threatened to leave for good but have subsequently returned, and the coach as well... These guys had infighting down to an art form. It would take me years to learn the fine art of Rooster fandom.

Another three-week journey, much more hazardous than the journey down South. My windscreen was pelted with rocks as I passed by housing trust homes, and when I stopped at a servo to ask for directions I found that my hubcaps were missing upon my return. Eventually I came to Grand Central: A shining oasis in a desert of weatherboard maisonettes. Unfortunately the bouncer wouldn't let me in 'coz I wasn't a Central member. Well, at least I wouldn't be needing flares or brass knuckles.

Having sequentially eliminated each of the clubs which I did not find completely and utterly repulsive, I came to the realisation that Glenelg was still my club. I was, I always had been, and always would be a Glenelg supporter. Therein lay the revelation of my existential quest: why ask why one supports? Simply support. Reasons are for the unenlightened.

Peaceful and content, I returned to the Bay, where I watched another 10-goal hammering in blissful nirvana.






For the humour-impaired: :lol:

PostPosted: Sat Jan 27, 2007 7:44 pm
by Punk Rooster
What, no mention of Port???

PostPosted: Sat Jan 27, 2007 8:09 pm
by Snaggletooth Tiger
...What Pseudo said! =D>

To quote Sideshow Bob:- "Ah, le mot juste!" :wink:

PostPosted: Sat Jan 27, 2007 8:22 pm
by Rik E Boy
Punk Rooster wrote:What, no mention of Port???


They can't even mention the name Punky but a top post by Shoe Do :D

regards,

REB

PostPosted: Sat Jan 27, 2007 9:04 pm
by mrjbeam1981
doing a spot of fishing REB? need some bait for the bigger fish ;)