Dear Dr REB....

[Strawb]

where is the good doctor.

[A Mum]

where is the good doctor.

Overworked and underpaid

[Strawb]

where is the good doctor.

Overworked and underpaid

sounds like most doctors he should try ripping off medicare

[Footy Chick]

[Rik E Boy]

Dear Dr. REB
I know and write top material for a big newspaper in Australia. I know more about the SANFL, and AFL than people believe. I feel people are not reading my articles and making a mockery of what I write on forum sites. I do believe the SANFL were wrong in not allowing the Ports to merge and I keep telling people this but they don;t want to listen
Signed
M

Dear Ferrethead.

The only top material you have ever written is when you were discussing the Thunderbirds 'Port' strip. The real problem is that people ARE reading your articles and making a mockery of what you write on forum sites. Perhaps if you stop looking at these sites for nuggets and go out and do some real investigative journalism your credibility will improve. People don't want to listen to you because your head is seriously punchable. I prescribe a visit to Ultra Tune because I heard that the local car mechanic left his bag behind after he made that TV commercial. Sorry mate, didn't need to bag you........................but it had to be done!

regards,

Dr REB

[OnSong]

Dear Dr REB,

I've been trying my best bowling spin for my country. I'm taking wickets and doing the job.
Why doesn't WCP like me?

Ritzy.

[Rik E Boy]

Dear Dr REB,

I've been trying my best bowling spin for my country. I'm taking wickets and doing the job.
Why doesn't WCP like me?

Ritzy.

Dear Ritz,

you reap what you have sown. It happened a few years ago. A country bumpkin with a club foot and false teeth wearing his overalls with a Gerbil in the pocket approached you for an autograph at a Qld vs. SA shield match. He was once your biggest fan. However when he approached you were scared off by the prodigous amount of blowflies and the overpowering stench of cow5hit and you headed back into the pavilion faster than Roy could say 'Gone fishin'. This gentleman farmer even learnt how to read just so he could read your much sought after signature. Alas, like the Elephant, man he's never going to forget nor forgive. I suggest that you continue with your illustrious Test career as after all....you are the best available.

regards,

Dr REB

[Q.]

Dear Dr REB

I have been given ten million dollars to spend. I thought it would be easy, but now it keeps me awake night after night as Bartels, Boyds, Barlows and Bastinacs run circles around my mind. What should I do?

Regards
Q

[Rik E Boy]

Dear Dr REB

I have been given ten million dollars to spend. I thought it would be easy, but now it keeps me awake night after night as Bartels, Boyds, Barlows and Bastinacs run circles around my mind. What should I do?

Regards
Q

Ah *taps Stethoscope*, your problem is simple Q - you have contracted SuperCoach Swine Flu. It is a seasonal disease that reaches pandemic proportions in Australia during the early weeks of Autumn. Seeing as you are in Hogg Premier League this year I prescribe a solid diet of Spuds and Lemons, that way you can save some of your ten million dollars as you fight off relegation in the spring. A poor result in Hogg Premier will lessen your likelihood of contracting this disease again next March. Meanwhile Q, I believe the only B you should be worried about is Bond................James Bond.

regards,

Dr REB

[Strawb]

Dear Dr. REB,
I am wondering if my own club wants rid of me. It took us 4 years of finals to win a Grand Final. I told Mr. Scott he was wrong and acted like I was choking myself. But now I am worried with the hiring of Dean Laidley. Will I be sacked by the end of the year.
Signed M.W

[MW]

Dear Dr. REB,
I am wondering if my own club wants rid of me. It took us 4 years of finals to win a Grand Final. I told Mr. Scott he was wrong and acted like I was choking myself. But now I am worried with the hiring of Dean Laidley. Will I be sacked by the end of the year.
Signed M.W

That wasn't me by the way...

[Voice]

Dear Dr REBCAT
I've decided to grow a mullet but it is making people call me John Farnham. I also seem to have contracted this problem due to a badly thought out username on a paticular forum of which I won't mention the name.

[Strawb]

Dear Dr. REB
I have a huge problem I coach a team for all South Australians and life ain't soo good we are 0-4 and looking like being 0-5 after this week. I am worried as the last coach that was 0-4 was sacked will this happen to me and why is these sharp things being put in my back.
Signed
N. Craig

[purch]

Dear Dr REB,

Ever since my appearance on Letterman my notoriety has gradually deteriorated. Now I find that I am out of work this year. But even worse are the nightmares that I've been suffering lately. All I dream about are giant ducks. Ducks in my head, ducks at the door, ducks in my bed. My last Doctor made my join the Dreamteam Quacktastic Football League and now I sit unnervingly in top position. One of my hands only has four fingers. Do ducks have four fingers too?

I am scared. Please help.

Regards,

Brett B

[Strawb]

doctor REB your waiting room is getting full

[Punk Rooster]

doctor REB your waiting room is getting full

that's Medicare/Bulk-billing for you...

[Rik E Boy]

Dear Dr. REB,
I am wondering if my own club wants rid of me. It took us 4 years of finals to win a Grand Final. I told Mr. Scott he was wrong and acted like I was choking myself. But now I am worried with the hiring of Dean Laidley. Will I be sacked by the end of the year.
Signed M.W

Dear MW,

you may be in trouble. The club has ordered a bottle of testicle growing medication so that means they might have the balls to do this year what they clearly didn't have the balls to do last year. But all is not lost. Jimmy Hird and Kevin Sheedy loves you. A trip to Blacktown could prove to be most beneficial in helping the multiple wounds in your back heal.

regards,

Dr REB

[Rik E Boy]

Dear Dr REBCAT
I've decided to grow a mullet but it is making people call me John Farnham. I also seem to have contracted this problem due to a badly thought out username on a paticular forum of which I won't mention the name.

Dear Farnsey,

I am sorry but I don't treat anyone who has had any dealings with the Carlton crew. I can recommend the services of a colleague of mine who is at present busy with a patient out at Barwon prison. If you get your haircut that might help him improve the outcome that he got with his last patient. Stay away from unassembled exercise bikes.

regards,

Dr REB

[Rik E Boy]

Dear Dr. REB
I have a huge problem I coach a team for all South Australians and life ain't soo good we are 0-4 and looking like being 0-5 after this week. I am worried as the last coach that was 0-4 was sacked will this happen to me and why is these sharp things being put in my back.
Signed
N. Craig

Dear Mumbles,

this symptom is becoming quite common in your profession. My advice to you is to continue to speak in riddles in your press conferences so you can appear knowledgeable even though you are panicking in the coaching box on match day. Speak with Mr Trigger and tell him to stop saying that he has full confidence in you - that should stop the sharks circling. I prescribe an honourable loss against the Bulldogs before a dose of victory against the youth of Richmond at Blackbird park. If you don't win that then the sharp things might start hitting your front as well. You won't be sacked like your predecessor as he was nothing to Crow about.

regards,

Dr REB

[Rik E Boy]

Dear Dr REB,

Ever since my appearance on Letterman my notoriety has gradually deteriorated. Now I find that I am out of work this year. But even worse are the nightmares that I've been suffering lately. All I dream about are giant ducks. Ducks in my head, ducks at the door, ducks in my bed. My last Doctor made my join the Dreamteam Quacktastic Football League and now I sit unnervingly in top position. One of my hands only has four fingers. Do ducks have four fingers too?

I am scared. Please help.

Regards,

Brett B

Dear ?

I'd like to help but I don't know who the **** you are. I tell you, medicine is not all it's quacked up to be. Now that I've done bugger all, here's your bill!

regards,

Dr REB