Things that make you sad.

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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby The Bedge » Thu Jul 23, 2020 12:17 pm

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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Lightning McQueen » Fri Aug 14, 2020 11:23 am

I'm a bit of a softy when it comes to goodbyes, last Friday farewelled someone that has been here for 15 years and then another today that has been here for over 20 years.

Both women and both have given me a hard time over the years and we've had countless arguments that are forgotten instantly and we move on.

Both of them burst into tears as I gave them a goodbye hug despite me giving them the ole "Please don't cry on me". I hate seeing women cry, it's probably been a downfall for me during my life.

We generally just take for granted our work colleagues when in actual fact, we probably spend more awake time with them than our own family.
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby heater31 » Fri Aug 14, 2020 11:37 am

Lightning McQueen wrote:We generally just take for granted our work colleagues when in actual fact, we probably spend more awake time with them than our own family.


That we certainly do. Was quite affected recently when I was contacted by a family member of a former work colleague. They advised me she had hours to live. 3 hours later she was gone. Was very good friends with her and even scored a few invites to family celebrations over the years we worked together.
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Booney » Tue Aug 18, 2020 9:55 am

My boss has just literally done a desk flip walk out.
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby mighty_tiger_79 » Tue Aug 18, 2020 10:09 am

Booney wrote:My boss has just literally done a desk flip walk out.
Does that leave you to pick up the pieces?

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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Booney » Tue Aug 18, 2020 10:14 am

mighty_tiger_79 wrote:
Booney wrote:My boss has just literally done a desk flip walk out.

Does that leave you to pick up the pieces?


I don't know right now mate. He's been closing in on breaking point for several months, I'd even got in touch with his wife to work out what we can/should do, I've been particularly worried for the last 4 weeks about him. Right now work comes a distant last, far more concerned about him and his family.
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Footy Chick » Tue Aug 18, 2020 11:00 am

Booney wrote:
mighty_tiger_79 wrote:
Booney wrote:My boss has just literally done a desk flip walk out.

Does that leave you to pick up the pieces?


I don't know right now mate. He's been closing in on breaking point for several months, I'd even got in touch with his wife to work out what we can/should do, I've been particularly worried for the last 4 weeks about him. Right now work comes a distant last, far more concerned about him and his family.


just make sure you dont end up in that same position too
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Magellan » Tue Aug 18, 2020 11:02 am

Booney wrote:
mighty_tiger_79 wrote:
Booney wrote:My boss has just literally done a desk flip walk out.

Does that leave you to pick up the pieces?


I don't know right now mate. He's been closing in on breaking point for several months, I'd even got in touch with his wife to work out what we can/should do, I've been particularly worried for the last 4 weeks about him. Right now work comes a distant last, far more concerned about him and his family.

Glad to hear you've kept your eye on him, when people reach breaking point (as you described it) they can react in extreme and irrational ways. Do you think his situation entirely driven by your work environment?
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Booney » Tue Aug 18, 2020 11:04 am

Footy Chick wrote:
Booney wrote:
mighty_tiger_79 wrote:
Booney wrote:My boss has just literally done a desk flip walk out.

Does that leave you to pick up the pieces?


I don't know right now mate. He's been closing in on breaking point for several months, I'd even got in touch with his wife to work out what we can/should do, I've been particularly worried for the last 4 weeks about him. Right now work comes a distant last, far more concerned about him and his family.


just make sure you dont end up in that same position too


I'll be fine and thank you.

He's bitten off more than he can chew at work and at home, he simply needs to take a break, it's been too long since he had a weekend away on the suds or left his computer alone, I have no problems doing either.
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Booney » Tue Aug 18, 2020 11:13 am

Magellan wrote:
Booney wrote:
mighty_tiger_79 wrote:
Booney wrote:My boss has just literally done a desk flip walk out.

Does that leave you to pick up the pieces?


I don't know right now mate. He's been closing in on breaking point for several months, I'd even got in touch with his wife to work out what we can/should do, I've been particularly worried for the last 4 weeks about him. Right now work comes a distant last, far more concerned about him and his family.

Glad to hear you've kept your eye on him, when people reach breaking point (as you described it) they can react in extreme and irrational ways. Do you think his situation entirely driven by your work environment?


No, he's got a range of commitments with family that have him burning the candle at both ends. He's not had a decent holiday for about 6 years and can't let things go, sweats the small stuff too much.
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby mighty_tiger_79 » Tue Aug 18, 2020 11:15 am

Time for a holiday to refresh and recharge the batteries.

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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby woodublieve12 » Tue Aug 18, 2020 11:27 am

Magellan wrote:
Booney wrote:
mighty_tiger_79 wrote:
Booney wrote:My boss has just literally done a desk flip walk out.

Does that leave you to pick up the pieces?


I don't know right now mate. He's been closing in on breaking point for several months, I'd even got in touch with his wife to work out what we can/should do, I've been particularly worried for the last 4 weeks about him. Right now work comes a distant last, far more concerned about him and his family.

Glad to hear you've kept your eye on him, when people reach breaking point (as you described it) they can react in extreme and irrational ways. Do you think his situation entirely driven by your work environment?


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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby amber_fluid » Tue Aug 18, 2020 11:31 am

Settle down Wubsy






;)
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Bum Crack » Tue Aug 18, 2020 11:32 am

amber_fluid wrote:Settle down Wubsy






;)

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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby woodublieve12 » Tue Aug 18, 2020 11:33 am

amber_fluid wrote:Settle down Wubsy






;)


Image
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby whufc » Tue Aug 18, 2020 11:50 am

Seeing a gym members life deteriorate right in front of our eyes.

He has been a regular for two years now and has seen some massive improvements. Whilst we knew his history was a story of substance abuse in particular drugs he had been a perfect role model gym member in his time with us. Lockdown has not been kind to him and we have a seen a dramatic downturn in his habits. He is clearly back on the ice to the point my non professional experience tells me he now has drug induced physcosis.

I speak to him on a regular basis, he has broken down in front of me crying like a baby on two occasions in the last week, yet I can never quite get him to disclose his issues.

The problem I now have is that his behaviour is becoming an issue in the gym, we are the last positive place left in his life but we are nearly at a point where we have to take that away from him. I have a lot of pressure from fellow members who being in a regional town are not use to these type of characters. some of their attitudes towards him are unfair but some make very valid points.

I feel like cancelling his membership is literally a death sentence and I don't think I'm ready to live with the potential consequences from my actions......I haven't lost hope on him just yet. In saying that I'm flirting a very fine line between helping him and facing the consequences if he was to hurt/abuse/insult another member or staff member as his behaviour is starting to cross the line.

We are trying to offer him professional help using the ALGEE mental health first aid training but he is not at a point where he accepts he has an issue.

I don't get paid anywhere near enough for this shit.
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Booney » Tue Aug 18, 2020 12:02 pm

FWIW, I think your obligation is to ensure the facility is safe for everyone to use, that's your professional obligation.

If you're in a position to help the individual over and above your work obligations then you should be congratulated, however, the choices he makes shouldn't impact upon anyone that uses the centre or how you approach maintaining that safe space for others.
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Magellan » Tue Aug 18, 2020 12:11 pm

whufc wrote:Seeing a gym members life deteriorate right in front of our eyes.

He has been a regular for two years now and has seen some massive improvements. Whilst we knew his history was a story of substance abuse in particular drugs he had been a perfect role model gym member in his time with us. Lockdown has not been kind to him and we have a seen a dramatic downturn in his habits. He is clearly back on the ice to the point my non professional experience tells me he now has drug induced physcosis.

I speak to him on a regular basis, he has broken down in front of me crying like a baby on two occasions in the last week, yet I can never quite get him to disclose his issues.

The problem I now have is that his behaviour is becoming an issue in the gym, we are the last positive place left in his life but we are nearly at a point where we have to take that away from him. I have a lot of pressure from fellow members who being in a regional town are not use to these type of characters. some of their attitudes towards him are unfair but some make very valid points.

I feel like cancelling his membership is literally a death sentence and I don't think I'm ready to live with the potential consequences from my actions......I haven't lost hope on him just yet. In saying that I'm flirting a very fine line between helping him and facing the consequences if he was to hurt/abuse/insult another member or staff member as his behaviour is starting to cross the line.

We are trying to offer him professional help using the ALGEE mental health first aid training but he is not at a point where he accepts he has an issue.

I don't get paid anywhere near enough for this shit.

You're in a tough spot, whufc. You clearly care about your clients, but that also cuts both ways in that you have an obligation to provide a safe and comfortable fitness environment. A tough line to walk when some clients don't fit the mold.

There's not much you can do if he doesn't accept there is a problem, which there clearly is. You have established a strong rapport with him given he feels comfortable in crying in front of you and opening up to you directly. Perhaps there is an opportunity for him to open up further and acknowledge his issues? Without wanting to overstate things, you are probably a key person in his life at the moment, and may have the power to be an 'influencer' (in the proper sense of the word).
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby whufc » Tue Aug 18, 2020 1:08 pm

Yeah I guess at the moment the challenge is that his behaviour is no risk to anyone from a physical or verbal sense.

His only 'crime' at the moment is that other people feel uncomfortable due to his 'odd' behaviour eg wearing sunnies in the gym, he does the breakfast club punch in the air everytime he leaves the gym, occasionally will dance on the spot whilst looking in the mirrors. That in itself present a challenge in our affluent community, we once received a feedback form suggesting a members should be cancelled because they had a shaved head and tattoos.....they look like a bikie. That was the legit wording.

The other challenge is being a community centre that reports to Council we need a fair case to 'ban' someone or 'cancel' their membership, we probably need a bit more than 'odd' behaviour to get it through Council. Whilst I believe its drug induced behaviour due to my years of living in Elizabeth/Smithfield and seeing it first hand I have no evidence of this in his case.

If I was a private gym I would be able to pull him aside and whisper in his ear to piss off. That is not an option I have being in the organisation I'm in and to be honest wouldn't do it that way anyhow.

Fun times......
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Re: Things that make you sad.

Postby Bum Crack » Tue Aug 18, 2020 1:22 pm

whufc wrote:Yeah I guess at the moment the challenge is that his behaviour is no risk to anyone from a physical or verbal sense.

His only 'crime' at the moment is that other people feel uncomfortable due to his 'odd' behaviour eg wearing sunnies in the gym, he does the breakfast club punch in the air everytime he leaves the gym, occasionally will dance on the spot whilst looking in the mirrors. That in itself present a challenge in our affluent community, we once received a feedback form suggesting a members should be cancelled because they had a shaved head and tattoos.....they look like a bikie. That was the legit wording.

The other challenge is being a community centre that reports to Council we need a fair case to 'ban' someone or 'cancel' their membership, we probably need a bit more than 'odd' behaviour to get it through Council. Whilst I believe its drug induced behaviour due to my years of living in Elizabeth/Smithfield and seeing it first hand I have no evidence of this in his case.

If I was a private gym I would be able to pull him aside and whisper in his ear to piss off. That is not an option I have being in the organisation I'm in and to be honest wouldn't do it that way anyhow.

Fun times......

If he's not currently a risk to anyone, it's a bit hard to give him the arse. However, if he's back on the gear, it's only a matter of time before things start going pear shaped. Have you suggested AOD counselling? Sounds like there is a mutual respect there so he may take some advice on board if it came from you. Not sure if they have the matrix program down your way but this has been very beneficial for some of my clients who have had a long history of substance abuse. It's a group therapy program which runs three days a week over a three month period. Unfortunately, they need to accept there is a problem first. That's the hard part.
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