Things that make you laugh

Anything!

Re: Things that make you laugh

Postby HH3 » Wed May 13, 2015 11:55 am

Ive typed 3 or 4 things and deleted them all before posting because they would get me a life ban....

Its a shame too, coz I should be in my element in this convo

Lets see what @johno6 has to say about the matter....
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Re: Things that make you laugh

Postby carey » Wed May 13, 2015 11:57 am

HH3 wrote:Ive typed 3 or 4 things and deleted them all before posting because they would get me a life ban....

Its a shame too, coz I should be in my element in this convo

Lets see what @johno6 has to say about the matter....



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Re: Things that make you laugh

Postby Johno6 » Wed May 13, 2015 12:11 pm

I am on my last warning before perma-ban
so I aint saying shit
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Re: Things that make you laugh

Postby HH3 » Wed May 13, 2015 12:15 pm

Johno6 wrote:I am on my last warning before perma-ban
so I aint saying shit


You've changed man...
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Re: Things that make you laugh

Postby heater31 » Wed May 13, 2015 12:20 pm

HH3 wrote:
Johno6 wrote:I am on my last warning before perma-ban
so I aint saying shit


You've changed man...

That's what happens when you put a ring on a woman's finger ;)
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Re: Things that make you laugh

Postby Lightning McQueen » Wed May 13, 2015 12:25 pm

Johno6 wrote:I am on my last warning before perma-ban
so I aint saying shit

Just thinking of what could be going on in the whirlpool of a head of yours made me laugh until I stopped laughing.
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Re: Things that make you laugh

Postby Johno6 » Wed May 13, 2015 12:26 pm

heater31 wrote:
HH3 wrote:
Johno6 wrote:I am on my last warning before perma-ban
so I aint saying shit


You've changed man...

That's what happens when you put a ring on a woman's finger ;)


so its your fault then HH3!
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Re: Things that make you laugh

Postby HH3 » Wed May 13, 2015 12:27 pm

Johno6 wrote:
heater31 wrote:
HH3 wrote:
Johno6 wrote:I am on my last warning before perma-ban
so I aint saying shit


You've changed man...

That's what happens when you put a ring on a woman's finger ;)


so its your fault then HH3!


He said ring on a womans finger, not womans ring on your finger.....
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Re: Things that make you laugh

Postby Johno6 » Wed May 13, 2015 12:28 pm

I'm not sure if I'm the woman or the ring anymore..........
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Re: Things that make you laugh

Postby HH3 » Wed May 13, 2015 12:29 pm

You're the finger....
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Re: Things that make you laugh

Postby Johno6 » Wed May 13, 2015 12:30 pm

Thats what landed me in this mess in the first place.
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Re: Things that make you laugh

Postby Pseudo » Wed May 13, 2015 4:28 pm

fisho mcspaz wrote:This was in a Roald Dahl book so you might want to take it with a pinch of salt, but there was a scene where the characters had to collect some bull semen. They just did it by grabbing the bull's wang while he was trying to mount a cow, put a rubber bag around it (evidently experiencing a shortage of bull-sized frangers), and let the bull keep happily banging away. When he was done, they made off with the bag, mixed the contents with glycerol in tubes, then froze the tubes in dry ice to preserve the little wrigglers. The glycerol somehow stopped the sperm from freezing to death. Why I'm participating in this conversation, I don't know. This is taking procrastination to a new level. :shock:

:shock:

I may have to review my 10yo daughter's library ...

(edit)
and now I just had a mental image of Gene Wilder in purple top hat and cape singing about the calibre of bull semen he adds to his confectionery... you've ruined Willy Wonka forever :(
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Re: Things that make you laugh

Postby Footy Chick » Wed May 13, 2015 8:27 pm

and to think the schools banned "forever" by Judy Blume....
Don't play games with a girl who can play 'em better...

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Re: Things that make you laugh

Postby Footy Chick » Wed May 13, 2015 10:11 pm

At home with the Riccutios episode on Triple M this morning... bloody hilarious!

http://www.triplem.com.au/adelaide/shows/roo-ditts-breakfast/
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Re: Things that make you laugh

Postby stan » Thu May 14, 2015 8:21 am

Footy Chick wrote:At home with the Riccutios episode on Triple M this morning... bloody hilarious!

http://www.triplem.com.au/adelaide/shows/roo-ditts-breakfast/

Also the piss take of KG, Jars and Chuck is great.
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Re: Things that make you laugh

Postby carey » Thu May 14, 2015 9:07 am

Footy Chick wrote:At home with the Riccutios episode on Triple M this morning... bloody hilarious!

http://www.triplem.com.au/adelaide/shows/roo-ditts-breakfast/



I never ever thought John Blake would make it in to the things that make you laugh thread. I cant stand the idiot.....
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Re: Things that make you laugh

Postby Footy Chick » Thu May 14, 2015 10:10 am

I'm not a massive fan of a lot of his work either but that episode was a corker!
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Re: Things that make you laugh

Postby Mythical Creature » Thu May 14, 2015 10:45 am

Footy Chick wrote:
Dogwatcher wrote:Soooo...you're the semen expert, FC.
Brilliant.
You know that's going to get some good use.


hardly an expert - I'm sure others here with more experience than me.


Im not going to call myself an expert, however when I was at Uni I would work weekends and holidays at SABOR near Clare. This is a place that doesn't collect Bull Semen however it does collect Pig Semen. My job during "collection" time was to bring in the boars from a list of pre-orders (each pig had a number) and take them into the "collection" room. I would then get the next one on the list and put it in a holding pen next to the room and wait for the Boar to finish* and take it back and repeat the cycle. There were 2 collection rooms so it was reasonably busy.

Basically, they had a plastic Sow which the Boar would mount and there would be another guy in the room who would help the Boar shoot it into a filtered container. The guy had to grab the pig dick and squeeze tight for about 10 minutes until the pig had finished. If anyone has seen a pig dick you would know that it is kind of like a screw*. Apparently a trick to make it more comfortable was to use your left hand as the dick was "left hand thread". I was asked if I wanted to give this a try which I refused. I was happy just transporting the pigs to and from their pens.

There were about 150 Boars at this place, however some were used more than others, depending on the farmers preference and bloodlines etc.

On weekends all I had to do was clean out their pens each day. Would take around 4 or 5 hours each day and could do it at whatever time I wanted to as long as it got done. So Saturdays I would do it first thing and on Sundays whenever I felt like it. For the weekend work I got $41 an hour to clean shit which in 2001 for a Uni student was and probably still is pretty good coin.
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Re: Things that make you laugh

Postby Lightning McQueen » Thu May 14, 2015 11:43 am

Mythical Creature wrote:
Footy Chick wrote:
Dogwatcher wrote:Soooo...you're the semen expert, FC.
Brilliant.
You know that's going to get some good use.


hardly an expert - I'm sure others here with more experience than me.


Im not going to call myself an expert, however when I was at Uni I would work weekends and holidays at SABOR near Clare. This is a place that doesn't collect Bull Semen however it does collect Pig Semen. My job during "collection" time was to bring in the boars from a list of pre-orders (each pig had a number) and take them into the "collection" room. I would then get the next one on the list and put it in a holding pen next to the room and wait for the Boar to finish* and take it back and repeat the cycle. There were 2 collection rooms so it was reasonably busy.

Basically, they had a plastic Sow which the Boar would mount and there would be another guy in the room who would help the Boar shoot it into a filtered container. The guy had to grab the pig dick and squeeze tight for about 10 minutes until the pig had finished. If anyone has seen a pig dick you would know that it is kind of like a screw*. Apparently a trick to make it more comfortable was to use your left hand as the dick was "left hand thread". I was asked if I wanted to give this a try which I refused. I was happy just transporting the pigs to and from their pens.

There were about 150 Boars at this place, however some were used more than others, depending on the farmers preference and bloodlines etc.

On weekends all I had to do was clean out their pens each day. Would take around 4 or 5 hours each day and could do it at whatever time I wanted to as long as it got done. So Saturdays I would do it first thing and on Sundays whenever I felt like it. For the weekend work I got $41 an hour to clean shit which in 2001 for a Uni student was and probably still is pretty good coin.


Were there magazines there with pictures of naked pigs in them too?
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Re: Things that make you laugh

Postby Mythical Creature » Thu May 14, 2015 12:17 pm

Lightning McQueen wrote:
Mythical Creature wrote:
Footy Chick wrote:
Dogwatcher wrote:Soooo...you're the semen expert, FC.
Brilliant.
You know that's going to get some good use.


hardly an expert - I'm sure others here with more experience than me.


Im not going to call myself an expert, however when I was at Uni I would work weekends and holidays at SABOR near Clare. This is a place that doesn't collect Bull Semen however it does collect Pig Semen. My job during "collection" time was to bring in the boars from a list of pre-orders (each pig had a number) and take them into the "collection" room. I would then get the next one on the list and put it in a holding pen next to the room and wait for the Boar to finish* and take it back and repeat the cycle. There were 2 collection rooms so it was reasonably busy.

Basically, they had a plastic Sow which the Boar would mount and there would be another guy in the room who would help the Boar shoot it into a filtered container. The guy had to grab the pig dick and squeeze tight for about 10 minutes until the pig had finished. If anyone has seen a pig dick you would know that it is kind of like a screw*. Apparently a trick to make it more comfortable was to use your left hand as the dick was "left hand thread". I was asked if I wanted to give this a try which I refused. I was happy just transporting the pigs to and from their pens.

There were about 150 Boars at this place, however some were used more than others, depending on the farmers preference and bloodlines etc.

On weekends all I had to do was clean out their pens each day. Would take around 4 or 5 hours each day and could do it at whatever time I wanted to as long as it got done. So Saturdays I would do it first thing and on Sundays whenever I felt like it. For the weekend work I got $41 an hour to clean shit which in 2001 for a Uni student was and probably still is pretty good coin.


Were there magazines there with pictures of naked pigs in them too?


Na, but when they had finished they had a relaxed look on their faces!
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