Things that make you sad.

[JK]

I shaggged non stop anything that moved after breaking up from a 22 year relationship. Best time of my life, not sure about the advice to take up knitting and become a nun.
Each to their own.

For some people that's exactly what they need, in others it's only a temporary high and the void returns bigger and darker. Sounds like yourself, TDK, Valleys and LM (all probably through a little trial and error) figured put what worked best for y'all, which is exactly how it needs to be imho.

[Wedgie]

I shaggged non stop anything that moved after breaking up from a 22 year relationship. Best time of my life, not sure about the advice to take up knitting and become a nun.
Each to their own.

For some people that's exactly what they need, in others it's only a temporary high and the void returns bigger and darker. Sounds like yourself, TDK, Valleys and LM (all probably through a little trial and error) figured put what worked best for y'all, which is exactly how it needs to be imho.

Exactly. Each to their own, i had such a blast and got to meet so many different women from different ages. Was great for the confidence!
I know 6 trips to Thailand helped me heaps too!
Settled down now, it was good to get that out of my system though, it was more fun than my teenage years, older chicks are so much up for things!
Worst thing I could have done in those years was give up on women and take up a hobby, couldn't think of anuthing worse in what should be the best years of your life, a lot of blokes dont get the chance!

[Lightning McQueen]

Exactly. Each to their own, i had such a blast and got to meet so many different women from different ages. Was great for the confidence!
I know 6 trips to Thailand helped me heaps too!
Settled down now, it was good to get that out of my system though, it was more fun than my teenage years, older chicks are so much up for things!
Worst thing I could have done in those years was give up on women and take up a hobby, couldn't think of anuthing worse in what should be the best years of your life, a lot of blokes dont get the chance!

I had to be a good role model for my children and didn't want them to see a revolving door of women coming and going, I pretty much had them with me full time so my focus was on being a good father.

I did a bit of shopping about, I had a lot of female friends and with today's social media if you piss off the wrong type of woman she can go to town on you when you've done nothing wrong.

I'm so glad I was patient and didn't make a pig of myself, I like having an uncomplicated life and no skeletons in the closet.

[Wedgie]

I was an awesome role model for my son! He thought if Dad can get that much tail then it should be a breeze for him, gave him so much confidence with girls!

[HH3]

My last big break up was almost 10 years ago.

I went out and f**ked her friends.

Don't do that.

[Lightning McQueen]

I was an awesome role model for my son! He thought if Dad can get that much tail then it should be a breeze for him, gave him so much confidence with girls!

Your son was a little older than mine.

He was pretty happy with how I went in the draft though.

[Dutchy]

If we were all the same life would be ******* boring!

[Wedgie]

If we were all the same life would be ******* boring!

Dunno, if everyone ****** like rabbits it'd be pretty damn fun!

[The Dark Knight]

Recently breaking up with my girlfriend of four and a half years.

Out of respect for her I don't want to go into great detail- We went from having a wonderful first three years together, being deeply in love and looking at spending the rest of our lives with each other to recently having polar opposite lives and not being on the same page together at all like we once were which made it too hard to stay together. Devastated that it happened would be an understatement.

So it's been a stressful and very lonely last month or so for me leading into and then breaking up but I've tried to not let it get to me too much and had the good support of my mates, workmates and sister and mum around me.

Now after a night out with my cricket mates who picked me back up and some new female attention I have a reason to smile again. Things have started to turn around quicker than I thought.

Sorry to hear, Davo. Living that exact situation just a couple of months ahead of yourself, I know too well what you are going through. Fantastic to read that you have a great support network of family, mates and work colleagues.

It has been mentioned already, but working on yourself is terrific advice. Things like a creating a bucket list for things such as travel, fitness regime, career goals, hobbies and interests are great ways to work out what makes you happy. Since parting ways with my wife, I have invested in myself by way of therapy and have begun a fitness regime, which has been both therapeutic for me as well as restoring my confidence. I have a newly found focus on my career and what direction I want that to take, and have some travel plans in mind with my son for when that becomes a realistic financial possibility. All things to keep my mind focused.

If you ever need a chat mate, PM me. Talking through your situation with anybody happy to lend an ear is brilliant for mental and emotional reinvigoration. I’d be only too happy to lend an ear, share my experience and be there for you to vent yours.

Best of luck mate.

Thanks Scotty and good luck with what you're doing, sounds like your life is back on track.

I've become pretty self sufficient, focused and in control of my life and learning to do things for myself has been a good challenge. This has been a busy year for me and I think I'm setting up my life in the right manner.

I'm always happy to have a chat about life with people, it's reinvigorating.

[Booney]

While it's not an easy time the choices you lads have made, both mentally and physically, are the right ones and the ones that will lead to a happier, healthier more "you" you. A lad who I played some cricket with lost his old man about 4 years ago and has just watched his Mum go through treatment for breast cancer. He lives by the motto "Tough times creates tough people".

Good work boys, keep it up.

See you tomorrow, valleys.

[morell]

There is no right or wrong. What to do in that situation is a very personal choice.

If you were in a relationship where you were perhaps lacking affection or emotional connection, then sure maybe seeking that out with new people would be good. From my perspective that was never an issue, it was more a feeling of me "failing"and in turn having a sense of failure within myself.

To prove to myself that I still "had it" I tried to sleep with lots of women (I failed mostly, not trying to brag) but that included manipulation, subterfuge and really just being a bit of a scumbag. Felt great at the time, being able to brag to mates and whatever, but ultimately as I realised what i was doing I felt like more of a piece of shit and it just made the emotional trauma worse.

That was my point I suppose - the traditional advice is to "get back on the horse" - but that can be the worst thing in some people's predicament. Seen it plenty of times and had good mates spiral into some dark places taking that sort of action.

[Q.]

It's a great opportunity for self reflection and self improvement, perhaps taking the time to undo some conditioning at the hands of archaic notions of masculinity. Get your hands on some of Robert Augustus Masters works.

[morell]

It's a great opportunity for self reflection and self improvement, perhaps taking the time to undo some conditioning at the hands of archaic notions of masculinity. Get your hands on some of Robert Augustus Masters works.

Ohhh some reading.

Just read his essay on Shame. Its great! And given my post above, really rings true.

This section in particular:

http://robertmasters.com/writings/shame ... -exposure/

The epitome and key agent of aggression against ourselves is our inner critic. Our inner critic is a composite of the main critical/shaming voices we heard as a child. It provides a heartlessly negative appraisal of us, reinforcing our sense of ourselves as defective; we can never measure up. What was done to us by those who most successfully shamed us is what we are now doing to ourselves through our inner critic when we let it assume an authoritative position in our psyche.

As for archaic notions of masculinity. I often ponder how many of the world's problems (macro and micro) are caused by this. A huge proportion I would suggest. Even just now we had an example of one being passed from one generation to the next with the quantity of sexual partners being considered as a positive, rather than the quality of the emotional connections therein. An archaic notion indeed and the cycle continues.

[Lightning McQueen]

It's a great opportunity for self reflection and self improvement, perhaps taking the time to undo some conditioning at the hands of archaic notions of masculinity. Get your hands on some of Robert Augustus Masters works.

Nail hit on head IMO, it's easy to play the blame game but it wont help you next time around, you're only here once and you can never stop trying to improve on the person you are, without accepting and addressing your flaws you'll always find yourself back in the same predicament.

[Booney]

My rellies from up in Gladstone being airlifted to the RAH after their house burnt to the ground. Uncle with burns to hands and face and he and the Aunty with smoke inhalation. House completely destroyed.

He's lived there his whole life, it was his Mum and Dad's house so nearly 80 years of memories gone.

Heart breaking.

[amber_fluid]

My rellies from up in Gladstone being airlifted to the RAH after their house burnt to the ground. Uncle with burns to hands and face and he and the Aunty with smoke inhalation. House completely destroyed.

He's lived there his whole life, it was his Mum and Dad's house so nearly 80 years of memories gone.

Heart breaking.

That’s terrible mate.
Hope your uncle makes a full recovery.

To lose everything in one hit must be so heartbreaking.

[Booney]

I'll probably go and see them later today, depending upon their condition.

[MW]

My rellies from up in Gladstone being airlifted to the RAH after their house burnt to the ground. Uncle with burns to hands and face and he and the Aunty with smoke inhalation. House completely destroyed.

He's lived there his whole life, it was his Mum and Dad's house so nearly 80 years of memories gone.

Heart breaking.

Sorry to hear Booney. Fingers crossed for a speedy recovery.

[Footy Chick]

That's awful Boon, luckily they're ok.

[Dutchy]

My rellies from up in Gladstone being airlifted to the RAH after their house burnt to the ground. Uncle with burns to hands and face and he and the Aunty with smoke inhalation. House completely destroyed.

He's lived there his whole life, it was his Mum and Dad's house so nearly 80 years of memories gone.

Heart breaking.

Shit hope they are OK, what street in Gladstone?