Things that give you the sh1ts

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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby The Bedge » Fri Jul 13, 2018 10:56 am

Oh don't even get me started on CSA! :lol:
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Lightning McQueen » Fri Jul 13, 2018 11:04 am

The Bedge wrote:Oh don't even get me started on CSA! :lol:

I once owed them $30K thanks to estimates and late payment penalties, if you're behind $1 they slap on huge LPP's, got it all cleared within a month or so with some strategic negotiating.

Mind you, if I ever rang and got a woman I'd hang up and try again, 90% men haters.
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Brodlach » Fri Jul 13, 2018 11:18 am

Would be a tough job, everyone has a story whether true or false and trying to decide which one would be difficult

How many times would they get abused when it’s not their fault?
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby HH3 » Fri Jul 13, 2018 11:26 am

Brodlach wrote:Would be a tough job, everyone has a story whether true or false and trying to decide which one would be difficult

How many times would they get abused when it’s not their fault?


I think it depends on the person. I've had really good male and female people.

One lady did go to some lengths to paint me as a piece of shit once, even contacting my boss to garnish my wage. I ended up talking to someone else, and within a few minutes, I was in credit.
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby woodublieve12 » Fri Jul 13, 2018 11:30 am

I get the vibe people think I don’t want to spend time with my girls. Because if that’s what anyone is implying well, I don’t want to get banned so I won’t say it.

I am learning on the fly on how to be a single dad and it’s bloody hard. Like I said I didn’t choose this situation and I am doing bloody good job I reckon... I could be like most ex’s and say get f##### sort someone else out to watch the kids. But my kids will always come first and I love having them and if it means they still see their parents act like adults regardless of the situation than that will only help.
How we act as parents is pivotal to their growth and I want them to have the best possible situation for them.

I just get frustrated when I know how I would be if the role were reversed and it shits me the same sort “respect” is given. I didn’t become a parent to “babysit”. I am a dad and I bloody love it.
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Brodlach » Fri Jul 13, 2018 11:32 am

I seriously don’t think anyone thinks that Wubbzy


From what I have read I think you are an amazingl father and are going forward in extremely difficult circumstances

More power to you
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby The Bedge » Fri Jul 13, 2018 11:36 am

Head up bub.. it gets easier :heart:
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Lightning McQueen » Fri Jul 13, 2018 11:52 am

Brodlach wrote:Would be a tough job, everyone has a story whether true or false and trying to decide which one would be difficult

How many times would they get abused when it’s not their fault?

Absolutely, they've gotta hear people out though and not label immediately.

My lifetime monumental f-up:

Starting dating this chick when I was in my early 20's, she seemed nice.

After a couple of months I seen the inner pyscho unleashed, had a beer stein smashed over my head when I walked in after work one day, had a fork stabbed prong deep into my arm and then in a drunken frenzy I had a perfume bottle smashed over my head while I was asleep in bed and then she reached under the bed for a knife and proceeded to swing it about in my genital region as I tried to escape.

I got out to my car and drove to my mums house.....................totally naked LOL.

I never returned, both my parents houses used to get phone calls all night every week from Wednesday through to Saturday, to which no one would answer as we all knew who it would be, if anyone except me answered it, she'd hang up.

I did answer months later one night at 2am, it was her, blind drunk, crying incessantly, heavily pregnant.

I caved in, felt obliged to help her, all was well until she got out of hospital after the birth then she went straight to the bottle shop and got pissed.

I tried to help, but couldn't, I spent the next few years trying to gain some sort of custody, or at least, visitation rights, it cost me over $20K and she never showed up for court once, therefore no case could proceed.

For 18 years I paid in excess of $110K for a son I never got to see, my bad luck though, it's the system not the person working for it.


What did get me riled up though was whenever I tried calling the CSA to discuss the situation, if it was a woman that answered, I was basically labelled as one of them dads that abandoned his kids and wanted to dodge the system.

I feel for the lad, he's been brainwashed all of his life, his mum is still a crazy drunk that has never worked since and lives in a world of lies, I've had many phone calls over the years from her friends telling me that I need to intervene, family SA etc. never wanted to hear about it though.


It has burnt me inside for 19 years, he has a brother and two sisters that would love to meet him.
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Lightning McQueen » Fri Jul 13, 2018 11:54 am

woodublieve12 wrote:I get the vibe people think I don’t want to spend time with my girls. Because if that’s what anyone is implying well, I don’t want to get banned so I won’t say it.

I am learning on the fly on how to be a single dad and it’s bloody hard. Like I said I didn’t choose this situation and I am doing bloody good job I reckon... I could be like most ex’s and say get f##### sort someone else out to watch the kids. But my kids will always come first and I love having them and if it means they still see their parents act like adults regardless of the situation than that will only help.
How we act as parents is pivotal to their growth and I want them to have the best possible situation for them.

I just get frustrated when I know how I would be if the role were reversed and it shits me the same sort “respect” is given. I didn’t become a parent to “babysit”. I am a dad and I bloody love it.


I don't think so mate, I get what you're putting down and I'm sure everyone else does too.

The highlighted bit is exactly right.
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby mighty_tiger_79 » Fri Jul 13, 2018 12:05 pm

Brodlach wrote:I seriously don’t think anyone thinks that Wubbzy


From what I have read I think you are an amazingl father and are going forward in extremely difficult circumstances

More power to you


Spot on.
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Brodlach » Fri Jul 13, 2018 12:06 pm

Lightning McQueen wrote:
Brodlach wrote:Would be a tough job, everyone has a story whether true or false and trying to decide which one would be difficult

How many times would they get abused when it’s not their fault?

Absolutely, they've gotta hear people out though and not label immediately.

My lifetime monumental f-up:

Starting dating this chick when I was in my early 20's, she seemed nice.

After a couple of months I seen the inner pyscho unleashed, had a beer stein smashed over my head when I walked in after work one day, had a fork stabbed prong deep into my arm and then in a drunken frenzy I had a perfume bottle smashed over my head while I was asleep in bed and then she reached under the bed for a knife and proceeded to swing it about in my genital region as I tried to escape.

I got out to my car and drove to my mums house.....................totally naked LOL.

I never returned, both my parents houses used to get phone calls all night every week from Wednesday through to Saturday, to which no one would answer as we all knew who it would be, if anyone except me answered it, she'd hang up.

I did answer months later one night at 2am, it was her, blind drunk, crying incessantly, heavily pregnant.

I caved in, felt obliged to help her, all was well until she got out of hospital after the birth then she went straight to the bottle shop and got pissed.

I tried to help, but couldn't, I spent the next few years trying to gain some sort of custody, or at least, visitation rights, it cost me over $20K and she never showed up for court once, therefore no case could proceed.

For 18 years I paid in excess of $110K for a son I never got to see, my bad luck though, it's the system not the person working for it.


What did get me riled up though was whenever I tried calling the CSA to discuss the situation, if it was a woman that answered, I was basically labelled as one of them dads that abandoned his kids and wanted to dodge the system.

I feel for the lad, he's been brainwashed all of his life, his mum is still a crazy drunk that has never worked since and lives in a world of lies, I've had many phone calls over the years from her friends telling me that I need to intervene, family SA etc. never wanted to hear about it though.


It has burnt me inside for 19 years, he has a brother and two sisters that would love to meet him.


I am without words!

I feel for you LM and for your son. I hope someday somehow you can meet up
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Lightning McQueen » Fri Jul 13, 2018 12:13 pm

Brodlach wrote:
I am without words!

I feel for you LM and for your son. I hope someday somehow you can meet up


If I ever do, my life will be complete and they can take me away the next day!

I've seen photo's, he looks exactly like I did at the same age, and looks like my other son, everyone misses out.
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Brodlach » Fri Jul 13, 2018 12:16 pm

Lightning McQueen wrote:
Brodlach wrote:
I am without words!

I feel for you LM and for your son. I hope someday somehow you can meet up


If I ever do, my life will be complete and they can take me away the next day!

I've seen photo's, he looks exactly like I did at the same age, and looks like my other son, everyone misses out.

No wonder you are such a great parent to your kids and they want to be around you.

Always value what you have.
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Lightning McQueen » Fri Jul 13, 2018 12:25 pm

Brodlach wrote:No wonder you are such a great parent to your kids and they want to be around you.

Always value what you have.


Cheers mate, the empty feeling of helplessness that I've carried for so long makes me respect what I do have that much more.

It's a taboo conversation amongst my immediate family unless I bring it up, I do have a close call every couple of years where I think I've almost set up a meeting but it always falls through.

A happy family environment is the most valuable asset anyone can have.
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Corona Man » Fri Jul 13, 2018 12:39 pm

Good news. Learnt last night one of my step fathers mates who is a good bloke has enduring POA over him. Chatted to him last night and he agrees after the doctors assessment he will need to step in and take control of his affairs. This is a relief.
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby amber_fluid » Fri Jul 13, 2018 1:46 pm

Lightning McQueen wrote:
Brodlach wrote:No wonder you are such a great parent to your kids and they want to be around you.

Always value what you have.


Cheers mate, the empty feeling of helplessness that I've carried for so long makes me respect what I do have that much more.

It's a taboo conversation amongst my immediate family unless I bring it up, I do have a close call every couple of years where I think I've almost set up a meeting but it always falls through.

A happy family environment is the most valuable asset anyone can have.


Mate if Karma does actually exist you’ll meet him some day.
Good luck mate!
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Lightning McQueen » Fri Jul 13, 2018 2:00 pm

amber_fluid wrote:
Mate if Karma does actually exist you’ll meet him some day.
Good luck mate!

Cheers, without hope, we have nothing! It is a bitter pill to swallow though.
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby bennymacca » Fri Jul 13, 2018 4:43 pm

That’s an amazing story LM, and not in a good way. Really feel for you.

Was there any obligation for her to turn up to court? Like surely that would go against her fitness to be a mother
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby bennymacca » Fri Jul 13, 2018 4:46 pm

HH3 wrote:This doesn't really give me the shits, but its topical.

Tax returns been approved. Getting a decent chunk back.

The thing with the ATO and Child Support is, they calculate how much Child Support you pay based off your most recent tax return. But they also backdate payments. So say you earn $45k, you pay a certain amount, but then the next year you earn $50k, instead of calculating your next year of payments based on the $50k, they say you should've paid more Child Support last year, and take it from your return. Then that's what you pay for the whole next year.

This year's fine. The difference was $25 total over 52 weeks.

It has been $300+ before.

It's annoying because I've never missed a payment, and I usually pay more that Im obligated to each week. They sometimes call you and talk to you like you're a deadbeat dad.


I don’t know if it’s the same for child support, but for childcare rebate you log onto Centrelink and estimate your earnings for the future year and then the rebate is based on that

For me given I’m salaried it was relatively easy to tell them (overestimated by a bit but was pretty close)

I guess the issue with doing that for child support is you are paying your ex not the tax department
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby HH3 » Fri Jul 13, 2018 4:50 pm

bennymacca wrote:
HH3 wrote:This doesn't really give me the shits, but its topical.

Tax returns been approved. Getting a decent chunk back.

The thing with the ATO and Child Support is, they calculate how much Child Support you pay based off your most recent tax return. But they also backdate payments. So say you earn $45k, you pay a certain amount, but then the next year you earn $50k, instead of calculating your next year of payments based on the $50k, they say you should've paid more Child Support last year, and take it from your return. Then that's what you pay for the whole next year.

This year's fine. The difference was $25 total over 52 weeks.

It has been $300+ before.

It's annoying because I've never missed a payment, and I usually pay more that Im obligated to each week. They sometimes call you and talk to you like you're a deadbeat dad.


I don’t know if it’s the same for child support, but for childcare rebate you log onto Centrelink and estimate your earnings for the future year and then the rebate is based on that

For me given I’m salaried it was relatively easy to tell them (overestimated by a bit but was pretty close)

I guess the issue with doing that for child support is you are paying your ex not the tax department


Well all you can do is estimate. The difference between the loading on 2 weeks annual leave taken, four weeks taken, none taken, or all of it taken in cash on top of wages, etc can skew it.

Unforeseen pay increases, etc. You can report them, but they don't always get the end figure right.

I've never had a year in 8 years where I haven't had something taken from my return. And I've only had two pay rises in that time. And I've never missed a payment.

This one is 48c a week difference.
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