SAFooty.net Quiz Night.... The Details!!!

[pipers]

Right-o kiddies

The challenge is ON!

So far we have a Snouts table and a North Grog squad table..... there is now pressure for the 7 other clubs to come up with the goods as well!

Sheesh! My table is a Snouts table apparently!

It is a secular table and Port (obviously) and North will also be represented, although the other 8 attendees will be of SL-extraction.

[Rushby Hinds]

Free bun for who can remember penned this..

A view into the future: FootySA Quiz Night by Fat Alberton
PHIL H: Hello, and welcome to another edition of Local Footy Quiz. This year, the teams represent Grogs Class A...

[Cut to audience, all dressed alike in RWO shirts and red and white scarves, with a Grogs banner. Amongst them sits Dragonfly]

AUDIENCE: Go you Reds! We're going to smash the Snouts!

PHIL H: Yes, that's the spirit. And Snouts Wannabe Hacks.

[Cut to J Beam's hamster, John Fidge, sitting in the audience.]

JOHN FIDGE: He's been doing it all day! Hungry, Hungry Hippo! [Spies Dragonfly in the Audience] Eh, you, Dragonfly! Come Here! [Bites Dragonfly on the neck]

PHIL H: Err yes, well, representing Grogs we have Drebin...

DREBIN: Hello.

PHIL H: ...Lord Wedgie...

LORD WEDGIE: Heh heh heh. [he sips Toohey's Extra Dry]

PHIL H: ...RoosterMarty...

ROOSTERMARTY: Ah! [he sips champagne]

PHIL H: ...and Mr. Holly.

HOLLY: [gives thumbs-up sign] Hi

PHIL H: And representing Snouts Wannabe Hacks we have Borat..

BORAT: Hello.

PHIL H: .. Tigerboss...

TIGERBOSS: What? [He leans over to look at his namecard, on which someone has crossed out the"B" and replaced with a "T"]

PHIL H: ...J Beam... [J Beam gives a double screw-you sign] ...and Fatalberton.

FATALBERTON: Vegetable rights and peace. [Fatalberton gives a peace sign]

PHIL H: So, your starter for 10, no conferring: Registering on May 20, 2002, he came to FootySA...

[Fatalberton buzzes in]

ANNOUNCER: Snouts, Fatalberton.

FATALBERTON: Uh...Can I go to the toilet please?

PHIL H: No, I'm sorry, you're barking up the wrong tree there. 5 point penalty to Snouts, full question to Grogs, no conferring. ...He came to FootySA as one of the few South fans with a sense of humour...

[Drebin buzzes in]

ANNOUNCER: Grogs, Drebin.

DREBIN: Alright, now, eh, wasn't it, wasn't it, errr... ReakonMan?

PHIL H: Yes, well, you're almost there, can you give me any Moore?

DREBIN: Certainly, will fifty bucks do?

PHIL H: Absolutely spot on, well done Grogs, 10 points, and three bonus questions to you. "What is the name..."

[Lord Wedgie buzzes in]

LORD WEDGIE: Spoon Day?

PHIL H: Yes, well that's very well anticipated. Spoon Day it is.

[Fatalberton buzzes in and waves his arms]

FATALBERTON: Buzz, buzz...uh, sorry to hassle you or anything, Phil, but I really do need to go to the toilet really badly, you know.

PHIL H: Yes, well, the second bonus question to Grogs, who are ahead by 15 points, but it's early days yet...

FATALBERTON: Oh, no, guys, I'm just going to have to wee on Lord Wedgie's head.

PHIL H: ...Who said, "I don't buy beer from caravans"?

[Holly buzzes in]

HOLLY: Lenin!

PHIL H: Yes, I can accept that, although the exact answer is of course Psuedonymous. Well done, Grogs, 5 points. And what was the score...

[RoosterMarty buzzes in]

ROOSTERMARTY: I've got a Porsche. Hee hee!

PHIL H: Yes, well, that's not exactly what I've got written on the card, but I knew your father, so Grogs leads by 25 points.

ROOSTERMARTY: Daddy sends hugs. Hee hee!

PHIL H: So, starters for 10, fingers on the buzzers...Who has posted the most times on FootySA?

[J Beam accidentally buzzes in while dissembling his microphone]

ANNOUNCER: Snouts, J Beam.

J BEAM: What?

BORAT: We're getting trashed, we're getting completely trashed! [the guys confer] Isn't there some way we can cheat?

FATALBERTON: Guys, look, it's beginning to seep out.

TIGERBOSS: It's very simple, Fatalberton. Use the jug! [Tigerboss empties his water pitcher on Lord Wedgie's head]

PHIL H: Now I'll have to hurry you...Who has the most posts on FootySA?

[Lord Wedgie buzzes in]

ANNOUNCER Grogs, Wedgie.

LORD WEDGIE: It's me, isn't it?

PHIL H: No, I'm afraid not, your two week holiday in Queensland has seen Coorong slip into the lead.

LORD WEDGIE: Oh, damn. [the water pitcher falls on Lord Wedgie's head]

PHIL H: So with the score still standing at 25 to nothing, here goes...

J BEAM: [buzzing in] I'm completely bloody sick of this!

[he bashes in the floor and kicks Holly in the head]

Give us some easy ones, Phil, you big bottom-boil!

TIGERBOSS: Relax, we can handle this...J Beam!

J BEAM: [pulling out a hand grenade] Achtung! [he drops it on the Grogs team]

ROOSTERMARTY: It's not an automatic --

[BOOM! The Grogs team is demolished.]

TIGERBOSS: Okay, Phil, let's hear another.

PHIL H: So here goes with the starter for 10. What is the record number of beers drunk in a single afternoon at the footy?

[TIGERBOSS buzzes in]

ANNOUNCER: Snouts, Tigerboss.

TIGERBOSS: Six hundred and four, Flag Boy, Glenelg.

J BEAM: I told you that, Tigerboss, you bloody cheat!

PHIL H: 10 points, Snouts, and your question: Who produced the world's longest ever wee?

TIGERBOSS: [buzzing in] Flag Boy.

PHIL H: Correct, 5 points.

J BEAM: You bum bag!

PHIL H: The world's stupidest bottom-burp?

FATALBERTON: [buzzing in] Borat!

PHIL H: Correct, 5 points.

BORAT: It is not!

PHIL H: And finally, for 5 bonus points to take you into the lead: Who's been tampering with my question cards?

BORAT: [buzzing in] It was me! It was me! Damn, damn!

[Wedgie]

Whoever penned it is an idiot, as if I'd ever drink Tooheys Extra Dry!

[Pseudo]

Free bun for who can remember penned this..

A view into the future: FootySA Quiz Night by Fat Alberton

let me guess.......


wouldn't have been Fatalberton, would it?

[Rushby Hinds]

Free bun for who can remember penned this..

A view into the future: FootySA Quiz Night by Fat Alberton

let me guess.......


wouldn't have been Fatalberton, would it?

LOL

No it wasn't!

[Footy Chick]

Oh well, if nothing else it'll be a good comedy show..

[pipers]

Free bun for who can remember penned this..

A view into the future: FootySA Quiz Night by Fat Alberton

let me guess.......

wouldn't have been Fatalberton, would it?

Really? Blimey, I must have been drunk.

[MagicKiwi]

All I know is that I remembered it as I started to read it.

Could Imaginery Tales be the clue? Was it VV? (that's two V's by the way, font's weird).

[rogernumber10]

Can I ask a favour, for those of us who would quite like to go and can't get there. Is it possible after the event to get a list of the questions and answers, for the odd function in our part of the world, so we can blatantly steal material and not do the work ourselves???

Only asking on the basis that am / have made a small contribution to the night. (these school quiz nights you get roped into helping prepare are very daunting things indeed)

[smithy]

Free bun for who can remember penned this..

A view into the future: FootySA Quiz Night by Fat Alberton
PHIL H: .. Tigerboss...

TIGERBOSS: What? [He leans over to look at his namecard, on which someone has crossed out the"B" and replaced with a "T"]

HEHE - Where is my old sparring partner these days.

[mighty_tiger_79]

smithy

he's probably out preparing for the big day!

[smithy]

Ok thanks..
Just makes sure he gets his namecard right this time...

[spell_check]

All I know is that I remembered it as I started to read it.

Could Imaginery Tales be the clue? Was it VV? (that's two V's by the way, font's weird).

I reakon that's the work of valleysvirgin, yes.

But that tale of course could never happen...

Edit: It's the work of vv, if the author has been changed to fatalberton.

[MagicKiwi]

Is there a bun riding on* this?

[Footy Chick]

I think buns would be very fitting... I'm trying to organise buns! but our resident baker has jumped ship to work at Telstra of all places..


Does anyone know anyone that can help?

[smac]

We only give away virtual buns around here, why change that for the quiz night?

[Footy Chick]

We only give away virtual buns around here, why change that for the quiz night?

because we'll be face to face... what sort of question was that?

If you were having cyber sex with someone and you met them face to face would you still have cyber sex even though you can see each other?

[JK]

We only give away virtual buns around here, why change that for the quiz night?

because we'll be face to face... what sort of question was that?

If you were having cyber sex with someone and you met them face to face would you still have cyber sex even though you can see each other?

Only if she'd been lying about her photo

[smac]

Straight to the gutter FC?

What if the buns (or the sex, for that matter) are really bad though?

[Footy Chick]

fine.. no buns then!