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Re: Things that make you laugh

PostPosted: Mon Aug 22, 2022 12:11 pm
by am Bays
JK wrote:
Lightning McQueen wrote:
MW wrote:
Reckon I've told this a few times in here, but I ran the footy tipping at my old work 20 years ago. The prize money every year went to 1st, 2nd and 3rd. Pretty standard stuff.
One year, three of us were tied on top, so easy to work out I split the pot three ways and we went on our merry way. The lad who came 4th got the shits cause, and I quote "I came second so should get 2nd prize money, you three should split the first place prize money". Even after explaining the "past the post" theory on place getters, he was still going on about it.


Mate, I kid you not, I was in one comp where that was paid out that way, the 3 tied first placed people shared the first placed prize money and 4th got more than them 3 as the were deemed 2nd, there were huge scenes and the shiela running in gave no f***'s whatsover :lol: :lol:


They did this at the pub a few years back. Can't remember exactly how it played out but something like 3 people shared 2nd place prizemoney so the stand alone 3rd placegetter collected more than them. Lunacy!!


Should be an automatic disqualification for people who cant understand the "past the post" theory of placement...

Re: Things that make you laugh

PostPosted: Tue Aug 23, 2022 7:54 am
by whufc
Laugh or get slightly embarrassed.

So we had a new member join up at the gym today....she came in and appeared very nervy and bit new to it all despite the fact she looked very fit.

Anyway i'm taking her around the centre she isn't asking to many questions just being very polite and listening. She goes ahead with the membership.....there is me thinking ok she seems pretty new to all this so I'm giving the spill about how much experience in gyms she has, what are her goals etc and i get nothing from her other than a polite just want to improve cardio. So as I'm processing her paperwork I explain she has the oppurtunity FREE of charge to spend some time with our PT's have a program written up, be given some nutritional advice etc etc. Once again she politely declines but will keep it in mind and heads in the gym.

Turns out she just won a silver medal with the hockeyroos at the commonwealth games.....needless to say she could teach me a thing or two about training, nutrition, sports performance.

Re: Things that make you laugh

PostPosted: Tue Aug 23, 2022 11:01 am
by Jimmy_041
whufc wrote:Laugh or get slightly embarrassed.

So we had a new member join up at the gym today....she came in and appeared very nervy and bit new to it all despite the fact she looked very fit.

Anyway i'm taking her around the centre she isn't asking to many questions just being very polite and listening. She goes ahead with the membership.....there is me thinking ok she seems pretty new to all this so I'm giving the spill about how much experience in gyms she has, what are her goals etc and i get nothing from her other than a polite just want to improve cardio. So as I'm processing her paperwork I explain she has the oppurtunity FREE of charge to spend some time with our PT's have a program written up, be given some nutritional advice etc etc. Once again she politely declines but will keep it in mind and heads in the gym.

Turns out she just won a silver medal with the hockeyroos at the commonwealth games.....needless to say she could teach me a thing or two about training, nutrition, sports performance.


Great story right up to the punchline that didn’t disappoint

Re: Things that make you laugh

PostPosted: Thu Aug 25, 2022 3:29 pm
by Booney
Image

Re: Things that make you laugh

PostPosted: Thu Aug 25, 2022 3:51 pm
by Lightning McQueen
Booney wrote:Image

Phylis Inn

Re: Things that make you laugh

PostPosted: Thu Aug 25, 2022 4:09 pm
by Jimmy_041
Bingo is a brutal sport

Re: Things that make you laugh

PostPosted: Fri Aug 26, 2022 2:54 pm
by The Bedge
Lightning McQueen wrote:Phylis Inn

Wonder if she has SyPhylis

Re: Things that make you laugh

PostPosted: Tue Aug 30, 2022 1:41 pm
by The Bedge
One of the stakeholders we deal with, we have a lady whose paid permanent casual wages (2 days per week) as a coordinator.

It's a bit of a token role, its in an area that doesn't see much work/activity and i'd say we have called on her maybe 6 times in the past 10yrs.

She's just emailed informing she wants paid long service leave now. :lol:

LSL from what?! :lol:

Re: Things that make you laugh

PostPosted: Tue Aug 30, 2022 1:57 pm
by MW
The Bedge wrote:One of the stakeholders we deal with, we have a lady whose paid permanent casual wages (2 days per week) as a coordinator.

It's a bit of a token role, its in an area that doesn't see much work/activity and i'd say we have called on her maybe 6 times in the past 10yrs.

She's just emailed informing she wants paid long service leave now. :lol:

LSL from what?! :lol:


if role is permanent then entitled to LSL unfortunately but isnt it prorated based on avg hours over a certain amount of time?

Re: Things that make you laugh

PostPosted: Tue Aug 30, 2022 2:16 pm
by Brodlach
Last three years

Re: Things that make you laugh

PostPosted: Tue Aug 30, 2022 3:07 pm
by Booney
Brodlach wrote:Last three years


Must have been funny.

Re: Things that make you laugh

PostPosted: Tue Aug 30, 2022 3:09 pm
by The Bedge
MW wrote:if role is permanent then entitled to LSL unfortunately but isnt it prorated based on avg hours over a certain amount of time?

Yeah right fair enough - still amusing haha! I thought she was being very ambitious given it's just a token position / wage really in the scheme of things.

Re: Things that make you laugh

PostPosted: Tue Aug 30, 2022 3:21 pm
by Brodlach
Booney wrote:
Brodlach wrote:Last three years


Must have been funny.

I was talking about the long service leave

Re: Things that make you laugh

PostPosted: Tue Aug 30, 2022 4:53 pm
by Corona Man
Lightning McQueen wrote:
Booney wrote:Image

Phylis Inn

At least she gave her regards. Be rude not to.

Re: Things that make you laugh

PostPosted: Wed Aug 31, 2022 12:06 am
by DOC
Is that one of our better beaches in SA?

Capture.PNG
Capture.PNG (356.24 KiB) Viewed 1207 times

Re: Things that make you laugh

PostPosted: Wed Aug 31, 2022 11:59 am
by Jimmy_041
DOC wrote:Is that one of our better beaches in SA?

Capture.PNG


It is if you want to lose a fair chunk of weight in one swim

Not enough room to put Carrickalinga there

Re: Things that make you laugh

PostPosted: Sat Sep 03, 2022 9:20 pm
by Pseudo
"FUGLY" is a valid guess in Wordle. :lol:

Re: Things that make you laugh

PostPosted: Tue Sep 06, 2022 2:10 pm
by Jimmy_041
Millionaire and taxpayer funded retiree Murdoch haters; Rudd and Turnbull stumping up $5,000 each for the crowd funding for Crikey.

Both are heavily virtuous until they have to put their hand in their pocket

Re: Things that make you laugh

PostPosted: Tue Sep 06, 2022 2:26 pm
by Booney
Jimmy_041 wrote:Millionaire and taxpayer funded retiree Murdoch haters; Rudd and Turnbull stumping up $5,000 each for the crowd funding for Crikey.

Both are heavily virtuous until they have to put their hand in their pocket


Cleaner checked behind the couch cushions?

Re: Things that make you laugh

PostPosted: Tue Sep 06, 2022 2:49 pm
by Jimmy_041
Watching this joke on the weekend

Nothing to see here - everything's rosy



Except....

https://www.news.com.au/travel/travel-u ... 8fa8294bec