SA Footy

I think friendship groups have a lot to do with it. My son was heading that way, we encouraged him to move friendship groups, he did and it worked very well.

I feel for the lad, and your son, but in then end they are really the only ones that can improve their situation.

I’d certainly be changing schools

The discrimination part??

Brodlach wrote:I think friendship groups have a lot to do with it. My son was heading that way, we encouraged him to move friendship groups, he did and it worked very well.

I feel for the lad, and your son, but in then end they are really the only ones that can improve their situation.

I’d certainly be changing schools

It’s an old saying that had rang true in my life….

If you want to be a millionaire hang around millionaires.

If you want to be employed hang around people who are employed.

If you want want to save money hang around people looking to save money.

That theory has pretty much been the pattern of my life. Sadly I was too easily influenced when I was younger which led me to follow the habits of my friendship groups. It’s no surprise my life has blossomed once I moved out the northern burbs and got into a country region.

whufc wrote:The discrimination part??

If that's what you want to label it as, yes.
Brodlach hit the nail on the head, surround yourself with better people & a better environment and most times you will become a better person.
You won't get dragged down to their levels.

Anyhow, that's digressing,
MW's friend somehow needs to get it into their head that if they don't go to school, the consequences in the future are dire.

gazzamagoo wrote:

whufc wrote:The discrimination part??

If that's what you want to label it as, yes.
Brodlach hit the nail on the head, surround yourself with better people & a better environment and most times you will become a better person.
You won't get dragged down to their levels.

Anyhow, that's digressing,
MW's friend somehow needs to get it into their head that if they don't go to school, the consequences in the future are dire.

I definitely agree with the hang around better people theory. Just not sure wealthier people etc means they are ‘better’ people. Depends on what you want I suppose

whufc wrote:

Brodlach wrote:I think friendship groups have a lot to do with it. My son was heading that way, we encouraged him to move friendship groups, he did and it worked very well.

I feel for the lad, and your son, but in then end they are really the only ones that can improve their situation.

I’d certainly be changing schools

It’s an old saying that had rang true in my life….

If you want to be a millionaire hang around millionaires.

If you want to be employed hang around people who are employed.

If you want want to save money hang around people looking to save money.

That theory has pretty much been the pattern of my life. Sadly I was too easily influenced when I was younger which led me to follow the habits of my friendship groups. It’s no surprise my life has blossomed once I moved out the northern burbs and got into a country region.

The same reasons I got out too.
And my life is now fantastic.

gazzamagoo wrote:

whufc wrote:

Brodlach wrote:I think friendship groups have a lot to do with it. My son was heading that way, we encouraged him to move friendship groups, he did and it worked very well.

I feel for the lad, and your son, but in then end they are really the only ones that can improve their situation.

I’d certainly be changing schools

It’s an old saying that had rang true in my life….

If you want to be a millionaire hang around millionaires.

If you want to be employed hang around people who are employed.

If you want want to save money hang around people looking to save money.

That theory has pretty much been the pattern of my life. Sadly I was too easily influenced when I was younger which led me to follow the habits of my friendship groups. It’s no surprise my life has blossomed once I moved out the northern burbs and got into a country region.

The same reasons I got out too.
And my life is now fantastic.

I think a lot of us on here who grew up in the north would have a story like this (although it's probably not just a 'north' issue, maybe just more prevalent). Like you two, I played footy/went to school with people who are now incarcerated and/or addicted, looking back you can definitely see the point where the two paths split. Glad I found my way on the path I did as well.

MW, can I ask what his reasoning is for not wanting to go?

MW wrote:Has anyone ever had the situation where your kids refuse to go to school?
If so, what helped to get them back to going to school?

Not for me, but a family member who's going through it with their kids at the moment. Nothing will get them back to school, and they refuse to go to counselling.
Talking early high school age.

I might add the second one started not going because he noticed the first one doing it and thought it was a great idea.

My daughter copped a king hit at school in early year 10, she had no intention of returning and the school counsellor wasn't particularly helpful.

We got her back on a revised program, by late in year 10 she was in a Cert III course barbering, she's now 22, has nearly 5 years barbering experience and despite having some issues with her current employer pulls +/- $60k per year and has herself a career.

It was a pretty harrowing time, I don't wish it upon anyone but with the right guidance, some soft and tough love there can be a positive outcome.

It's an awful situation to be in, I wish them all well.

whufc wrote:

Brodlach wrote:I think friendship groups have a lot to do with it. My son was heading that way, we encouraged him to move friendship groups, he did and it worked very well.

I feel for the lad, and your son, but in then end they are really the only ones that can improve their situation.

I’d certainly be changing schools

It’s an old saying that had rang true in my life….

If you want to be a millionaire hang around millionaires.

If you want to be employed hang around people who are employed.

If you want want to save money hang around people looking to save money.

That theory has pretty much been the pattern of my life. Sadly I was too easily influenced when I was younger which led me to follow the habits of my friendship groups. It’s no surprise my life has blossomed once I moved out the northern burbs and got into a country region.

I grew up in the North, watched a mate get stabbed after he was mouthy. Wasn’t a great group of 9.

Changed friendship groups shortly thereafter, managed to catch up with one of the nine at a football game last season, he and one other were the only two still alive. He was 51 and looked 80.

"Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. Its a very mean nasty place and I don't care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard ya hit. It's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done! Now if you know what you're worth then go out and get what you're worth. But ya gotta be willing to take the hits, and not pointing fingers saying you ain't where you wanna be because of him, or her, or anybody!

Brodlach wrote:I think friendship groups have a lot to do with it. My son was heading that way, we encouraged him to move friendship groups, he did and it worked very well.

I feel for the lad, and your son, but in then end they are really the only ones that can improve their situation.

I’d certainly be changing schools

I do agree about friendship groups and changing schools but with social media these days everyone knows each other and it’s a lot harder to stay away from ‘old’ friends who cause trouble.

whufc wrote:

gazzamagoo wrote:

whufc wrote:The discrimination part??

If that's what you want to label it as, yes.
Brodlach hit the nail on the head, surround yourself with better people & a better environment and most times you will become a better person.
You won't get dragged down to their levels.

Anyhow, that's digressing,
MW's friend somehow needs to get it into their head that if they don't go to school, the consequences in the future are dire.

I definitely agree with the hang around better people theory. Just not sure wealthier people etc means they are ‘better’ people. Depends on what you want I suppose

Agree but I dont think that's what they mean
Its more about positive influencers in your life.
Dont have to be wealthy.
The word "wealthy" is subjective in any case

If I buy some bathmats from Kmart is it a "Kmart hack"?

Armchair expert wrote:If I buy some bathmats from Kmart is it a "Kmart hack"?

Only if you start using them as a towel [emoji6]

heater31 wrote:

Armchair expert wrote:If I buy some bathmats from Kmart is it a "Kmart hack"?

Only if you start using them as a towel [emoji6]

And they are ANKO

Thanks everyone for the advice.
I don't think it's the school that's the issue, they go to Mercedes although I hear she was bullied by some boys there.
Unfortunately I think it's her home life that is causing it, Mum and Dad arent great together. Almost a rebellion against what is happening at home and her way of protesting it.
She's getting the desired effect I think because it is hurting her mother, and now her brother is doing the same because he doesnt see why he should go and not her.
Ironically they said to her they'll move her to Unley High if she doesnt go and she said she will never go to school if they do that...but she doesnt anyway.
She wants to be a mid wife, and knows full well she needs an education to achieve that. I fear there is something else going on we dont know about.

MW wrote:Thanks everyone for the advice.
I don't think it's the school that's the issue, they go to Mercedes although I hear she was bullied by some boys there.
Unfortunately I think it's her home life that is causing it, Mum and Dad arent great together. Almost a rebellion against what is happening at home and her way of protesting it.
She's getting the desired effect I think because it is hurting her mother, and now her brother is doing the same because he doesnt see why he should go and not her.
Ironically they said to her they'll move her to Unley High if she doesnt go and she said she will never go to school if they do that...but she doesnt anyway.
She wants to be a mid wife, and knows full well she needs an education to achieve that. I fear there is something else going on we dont know about.

How old are the kids MW?

MW wrote:Thanks everyone for the advice.
I don't think it's the school that's the issue, they go to Mercedes although I hear she was bullied by some boys there.
Unfortunately I think it's her home life that is causing it, Mum and Dad arent great together. Almost a rebellion against what is happening at home and her way of protesting it.
She's getting the desired effect I think because it is hurting her mother, and now her brother is doing the same because he doesnt see why he should go and not her.
Ironically they said to her they'll move her to Unley High if she doesnt go and she said she will never go to school if they do that...but she doesnt anyway.
She wants to be a mid wife, and knows full well she needs an education to achieve that. I fear there is something else going on we dont know about.

Unfortunately there usually is when teenage girls are rebellious, they need to find a way to get to the crux of the problem in a positive way, a way that she feels inclusive and comfortable.

I was lucky that I split from my wife at a pivotal time where my daughter was "growing up", we formed a very strong bond and she was by my side through everything, she was my rock when my dad died and any other time that I needed picking up.

I have always been there for her too, she is legitimately my best friend, it has helped both of us to remain well grounded, we tell each other everything.

Others don't have that and I see mums argue continuously with their teenage daughters, it really irks me.

Jimmy_041 wrote:

MW wrote:Thanks everyone for the advice.
I don't think it's the school that's the issue, they go to Mercedes although I hear she was bullied by some boys there.
Unfortunately I think it's her home life that is causing it, Mum and Dad arent great together. Almost a rebellion against what is happening at home and her way of protesting it.
She's getting the desired effect I think because it is hurting her mother, and now her brother is doing the same because he doesnt see why he should go and not her.
Ironically they said to her they'll move her to Unley High if she doesnt go and she said she will never go to school if they do that...but she doesnt anyway.
She wants to be a mid wife, and knows full well she needs an education to achieve that. I fear there is something else going on we dont know about.

How old are the kids MW?

15 and 13

MW wrote:

Jimmy_041 wrote:

MW wrote:Thanks everyone for the advice.
I don't think it's the school that's the issue, they go to Mercedes although I hear she was bullied by some boys there.
Unfortunately I think it's her home life that is causing it, Mum and Dad arent great together. Almost a rebellion against what is happening at home and her way of protesting it.
She's getting the desired effect I think because it is hurting her mother, and now her brother is doing the same because he doesnt see why he should go and not her.
Ironically they said to her they'll move her to Unley High if she doesnt go and she said she will never go to school if they do that...but she doesnt anyway.
She wants to be a mid wife, and knows full well she needs an education to achieve that. I fear there is something else going on we dont know about.

How old are the kids MW?

15 and 13

Have they got a favourite / cool uncle, aunty or friend?
Get them to talk to her / him