Things that give you the sh1ts

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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Magellan » Wed Dec 06, 2017 9:41 am

Spargo wrote:Arseh*les who don’t pick up after their dog, I’ve encountered this twice in the last week.
First was a bloke on Melbourne St who’s pooch was dropping nuggets whilst still walking. He seemed oblivious so I pointed it out as it was on the footpath out the front of a business I was about to enter. “Oh, ok” he said. I came back out & he’d simply kicked one of the droppings further up the footpath. WTF???
The second was last night on the Esplanade at Brighton, I’d pulled over to send a text message & this woman stopped by a tree whilst her dog laid one. She couldn’t tell I was watching her. She bent down halfway (with plastic bag in hand) looked around to see if anyone was looking, and left it there.
I caught up, slowed down & waited until more people were nearby - “I hope a lazy, selfish dog owner let’s their dog shit on your front lawn & leaves it just like you left your dogs shit back there under that tree” I yelled
She had nowhere to go & everyone was looking at her now - bitch.

Well done. No excuses for not picking up after your pooch. It's not that hard.
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Lightning McQueen » Wed Dec 06, 2017 9:44 am

Magellan wrote:
Spargo wrote:Arseh*les who don’t pick up after their dog, I’ve encountered this twice in the last week.
First was a bloke on Melbourne St who’s pooch was dropping nuggets whilst still walking. He seemed oblivious so I pointed it out as it was on the footpath out the front of a business I was about to enter. “Oh, ok” he said. I came back out & he’d simply kicked one of the droppings further up the footpath. WTF???
The second was last night on the Esplanade at Brighton, I’d pulled over to send a text message & this woman stopped by a tree whilst her dog laid one. She couldn’t tell I was watching her. She bent down halfway (with plastic bag in hand) looked around to see if anyone was looking, and left it there.
I caught up, slowed down & waited until more people were nearby - “I hope a lazy, selfish dog owner let’s their dog shit on your front lawn & leaves it just like you left your dogs shit back there under that tree” I yelled
She had nowhere to go & everyone was looking at her now - bitch.

Well done. No excuses for not picking up after your pooch. It's not that hard.

Not straight away anyway.
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Pseudo » Wed Dec 06, 2017 10:00 am

Magellan wrote:
Spargo wrote:Arseh*les who don’t pick up after their dog, I’ve encountered this twice in the last week.
First was a bloke on Melbourne St who’s pooch was dropping nuggets whilst still walking. He seemed oblivious so I pointed it out as it was on the footpath out the front of a business I was about to enter. “Oh, ok” he said. I came back out & he’d simply kicked one of the droppings further up the footpath. WTF???
The second was last night on the Esplanade at Brighton, I’d pulled over to send a text message & this woman stopped by a tree whilst her dog laid one. She couldn’t tell I was watching her. She bent down halfway (with plastic bag in hand) looked around to see if anyone was looking, and left it there.
I caught up, slowed down & waited until more people were nearby - “I hope a lazy, selfish dog owner let’s their dog shit on your front lawn & leaves it just like you left your dogs shit back there under that tree” I yelled
She had nowhere to go & everyone was looking at her now - bitch.

Well done. No excuses for not picking up after your pooch. It's not that hard.

No, it has to be left for a few days in the sun to go hard...
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Booney » Wed Dec 06, 2017 1:36 pm

When you're about to walk out the door and head to Adelaide Oval and shit goes to ******* shit at work and you're going ******* nowhere.

**** it. *******....*******....******* **** IT!
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Gozu » Wed Dec 06, 2017 1:46 pm

I remember once sitting down on the base of a tree that was covered in leaves and after a few seconds noticing a god awful smell looked down at my shoes and hiding in amongst the leaves had been a big fresh dog shit that now covered about 2/3 of the sole of my shoe. If there had have been a dog around I would've wiped it all over the bloody thing. Stepping in fresh dog shit sounds funny until it actually happens to you.
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Lightning McQueen » Wed Dec 06, 2017 2:30 pm

Gozu wrote:I remember once sitting down on the base of a tree that was covered in leaves and after a few seconds noticing a god awful smell looked down at my shoes and hiding in amongst the leaves had been a big fresh dog shit that now covered about 2/3 of the sole of my shoe. If there had have been a dog around I would've wiped it all over the bloody thing. Stepping in fresh dog shit sounds funny until it actually happens to you.

At least you had shoes on and didn't seep between the toes.
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby mighty_tiger_79 » Wed Dec 06, 2017 3:25 pm

at least you didn't sit on it
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby amber_fluid » Wed Dec 06, 2017 3:26 pm

Gozu wrote:I remember once sitting down on the base of a tree that was covered in leaves and after a few seconds noticing a god awful smell looked down at my shoes and hiding in amongst the leaves had been a big fresh dog shit that now covered about 2/3 of the sole of my shoe. If there had have been a dog around I would've wiped it all over the bloody thing. Stepping in fresh dog shit sounds funny until it actually happens to you.


It’s funny for the rest of us mate :lol: :lol:
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Gozu » Wed Dec 06, 2017 4:29 pm

Admittedly I've got a bit of a smile on my face thinking back about it I was so pissed off took me a couple of hours to get clean it all off stuck in all the grooves of my soles, to be honest I would've rather stepped in it barefoot. Hell of a lot easier to clean.
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Magellan » Wed Dec 06, 2017 4:40 pm

Gozu wrote:I remember once sitting down on the base of a tree that was covered in leaves and after a few seconds noticing a god awful smell looked down at my shoes and hiding in amongst the leaves had been a big fresh dog shit that now covered about 2/3 of the sole of my shoe. If there had have been a dog around I would've wiped it all over the bloody thing. Stepping in fresh dog shit sounds funny until it actually happens to you.

This post should be moved to the "Dogs that gave their shits to you" thread. ;)
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby bennymacca » Wed Dec 06, 2017 4:42 pm

Gozu wrote:Admittedly I've got a bit of a smile on my face thinking back about it I was so pissed off took me a couple of hours to get clean it all off stuck in all the grooves of my soles, to be honest I would've rather stepped in it barefoot. Hell of a lot easier to clean.


Squirt it with the hose outside. Takes a minute or two and shoes are clean.

Unfortunately I know from experience
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Gozu » Wed Dec 06, 2017 4:45 pm

bennymacca wrote:
Gozu wrote:Admittedly I've got a bit of a smile on my face thinking back about it I was so pissed off took me a couple of hours to get clean it all off stuck in all the grooves of my soles, to be honest I would've rather stepped in it barefoot. Hell of a lot easier to clean.


Squirt it with the hose outside. Takes a minute or two and shoes are clean.

Unfortunately I know from experience


This was out in public there were no taps around lol

I don't want to talk about this anymore, I'm still scarred :lol:
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Lightning McQueen » Thu Dec 07, 2017 8:48 am

Gozu wrote:
This was out in public there were no taps around lol

I don't want to talk about this anymore, I'm still scarred :lol:

You don't belong here if you're not talking shit! ;)
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby PatowalongaPirate » Fri Dec 08, 2017 9:39 am

Getting junk mail in my letterbox when it clearly states No Junk Mail.

What makes it worse is that it was a pamphlet from the Adelaide street preachers directly linking same sex marriage to Nazism.
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Spargo » Fri Dec 08, 2017 9:43 am

PatowalongaPirate wrote:Getting junk mail in my letterbox when it clearly states No Junk Mail.

What makes it worse is that it was a pamphlet from the Adelaide street preachers directly linking same sex marriage to Nazism.

Sorry, won’t happen again...
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Booney » Fri Dec 08, 2017 9:47 am

PatowalongaPirate wrote:Getting junk mail in my letterbox when it clearly states No Junk Mail.

What makes it worse is that it was a pamphlet from the Adelaide street preachers directly linking same sex marriage to Nazism.


I guess they didn't consider it "junk"?
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby tipper » Fri Dec 08, 2017 10:07 am

PatowalongaPirate wrote:Getting junk mail in my letterbox when it clearly states No Junk Mail.

What makes it worse is that it was a pamphlet from the Adelaide street preachers directly linking same sex marriage to Nazism.


lol. someone should let them know its a little late. i believe the governor signed the bill last night.
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Corona Man » Fri Dec 08, 2017 12:32 pm

Spargo wrote:
PatowalongaPirate wrote:Getting junk mail in my letterbox when it clearly states No Junk Mail.

What makes it worse is that it was a pamphlet from the Adelaide street preachers directly linking same sex marriage to Nazism.

Sorry, won’t happen again...

Next time he goes away, put his mail in the bins.
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Magellan » Fri Dec 08, 2017 12:52 pm

PatowalongaPirate wrote:What makes it worse is that it was a pamphlet from the Adelaide street preachers directly linking same sex marriage to Nazism.

Those street preachers are manic, aren't they?
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Re: Things that give you the sh1ts

Postby Booney » Fri Dec 08, 2017 12:56 pm

Magellan wrote:
PatowalongaPirate wrote:What makes it worse is that it was a pamphlet from the Adelaide street preachers directly linking same sex marriage to Nazism.

Those street preachers are manic, aren't they?


Pirate, if you tolerate this, your children will be next.
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