Are you ok?

Anything!

Re: Are you ok?

Postby BZB27 » Thu Feb 13, 2020 12:43 pm

Footy Chick wrote:
BZB27 wrote:Good work Wubbzy.

To

Since that day ive lost 15 kilos and im the fittest ive been since 2007.

It.



Can't wait to see this ;) :lol:

Also noticed you're heading to Salisbury too? Hopefully the weight loss throws your kicking foot off ;)


Haha 5 kgs to go till i break the 100 lol

Yeah back home finally. They have welcomed me back with open arms.
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Re: Are you ok?

Postby Lightning McQueen » Thu Feb 13, 2020 1:01 pm

BZB27 wrote:
Haha 5 kgs to go till i break the 100 lol

Yeah back home finally. They have welcomed me back with open arms.

Good luck for the season ahead mate.
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Re: Are you ok?

Postby Rik E Boy » Tue Mar 10, 2020 9:00 pm

Am I ok? I'm pretty ******* far from ok as Marcellus once famously said in Pulp Fiction.

I've been under prolonged stress being a team leader at my organisation, looking after the needs of and being strong for everyone else. I've been a referee in stand up fights and managed two employees who suffered life threatening conditions. Our arm of the business was being run as a dollars and cents operation where the rights and needs of employees were secondary to the bottom line. For over six years I was caught between senior managemeqnt above and staff members below, trying to get the best of both worlds happening while continuing to develop professionally and provide value to the organisation. For this challenging leadership role I received no financial reward. The last 18 months in my old department were very challenging indeed.

In July last year it was announced there was to be a restructure. Our unit was to be moved to another department. Usually everybody shits themselves when there is a restructure but our team was ecstatic. We had moved out of the profit driven arm of the organisation and into the field of compliance which is our primary function. Since then I've had about as much fun as Leon Cameron at last year's grand final.

The warning lights began to turn when I started getting duties taken away from me. I have always been versatile and have skills in multiple disciplines. Suddenly I was being asked to choose. As someone who is very passionate about my work I found this sudden necessity for choice to be quite confronting. Then in November I had the team leadership taken away from me. It wasn't even clearly explained, more implied. I thought I was stepping aside while a consultant came in to temporarily oversee management of the team. Not so, I was already out. Then there was a meeting with my team to tell them what they decided not to bother telling me, that I was no longer their manger. I was not invited to this meeting.

Christmas came and went, always a horrible time for me due to the death of my father and his birthday around then too. Shovelling dirt on a beloved pet's face at 6.30 in the morning didn't rank as my best ever Christmas morning. Oh well, onwards and upwards back to work REB. At 8.30 on my first day back I was called in to the office where I was told I was to be taken off a project because my work was late and that it wasn't up to standard. My work was sent for review days before project deadlines and I never got a straight answer as to what exactly was wrong with my work. Seeing as I have been writing training documentation for 15 years I suspected a personal angle to be involved in what should have been a business decision.

For the next two months I had to endure humiliation and bullying as our new consultant opted to consult with the most junior member of the team at the expense of his more senior colleagues. Here I was, 53 with 15 years experience and a Degree doing data entry while the young chap was writing work instructions. I even received an email from this consultant saying that writing was not my strength. This person was my new supervisor, something else the organisation neglected to tell me. So here is this person who obviously doesn't rate me, making evaluations to my department about what our new structure should look like.

Then happy days the organisation worked out the project manager wasn't a people person and disappeared faster than Warner in England. My hopes soared...maybe everything is going to be cool after all. Our team spilled the beans to our manager about the bullshit that was going on and she was shocked. Then the PD news filtered out and straight away we Unioned up. The restructure got knocked back because the new PDs went over everyone's heads. Union to the rescue. Delay, delay, delay with daily calendar appointments.....you'd go to work, is this the day? Is this day? Are they going to use Vaseline?

Last Tuesday the day finally arrived. It was a great result for everyone in the team but I got shafted. Everyone got bumped up a level but I got bumped down a level. Not tooting my own horn here but I know more than anyone in that team, I made it my business to know. They couldn't cut my pay but they can put you on something called Salary maintenance. Salary maintenance means I get paid at my current rate but I won't get a CPI pay rise for years until my new level 'catches up' to my current salary. Not what you want for wage or your super at 53.

After the meeting I met with a delegate and my union rep. I was told the original PDs were ****** for everyone and that the Union were aiming to keep everyone in a job which they managed to do. I also got told that they were going to give me the arse. If it wasn't for my Union I was gone. I was close to breaking all meeting but when I heard that my reward for learning more and putting up my hand to lead the team was a DCM. I felt worthless, I was devasted. I knew this was coming but when the consultant left my spirits were lifted only to be emphatically crushed later.

My union guy talked about something called OSD Organisational Stress Disorder and a middle aged middle management type was at risk. Not sleeping? Tick, not interested in things you normally love, tick, tick, tick. I was at risk. Then came the question "have you had any suicidal thoughts" and my inability to answer the question was all the answers required. All,if a sudden, these thoughts could not be compartmentalised and rationalised. Shit just got real.

Somehow I made it through the meetings and went outside and completely broke down. Everything just crashed down on me at once like a tube at Rip Curl BANG. I'm in the washing machine and I'd never felt so sick in my life. I couldn't hold my head up. I went into work the next day and my supervisor said "what are you doing here". On the way out I got help. EAP, HR, Mental Health first aid officer, and a GP appointment. I'm seeing a shrink in a few weeks and I've reached out to many people. I'm not about to implement a permanent solution to a temporary problem. I have a mental health plan and I've applied for other jobs as I need to get out of where I am.

Finally, I told my boys why Dad has been at home. They are 17 and 23 but I was honest and explained to them that part if being a man is knowing that asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness. I've been dudded at work, but I still have a job. If I land one of the gigs I'm trying out for, I actually come out in front. I've got more shit to come but I reckon I'm through the worst of it. But the last year or so has been the toughest of my life.

Regards,

REB
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Re: Are you ok?

Postby Failed Creation » Tue Mar 10, 2020 9:09 pm

Rik E Boy wrote:Am I ok? I'm pretty ******* far from ok as Marcellus once famously said in Pulp Fiction.

I've been under prolonged stress being a team leader at my organisation, looking after the needs of and being strong for everyone else. I've been a referee in stand up fights and managed two employees who suffered life threatening conditions. Our arm of the business was being run as a dollars and cents operation where the rights and needs of employees were secondary to the bottom line. For over six years I was caught between senior managemeqnt above and staff members below, trying to get the best of both worlds happening while continuing to develop professionally and provide value to the organisation. For this challenging leadership role I received no financial reward. The last 18 months in my old department were very challenging indeed.

In July last year it was announced there was to be a restructure. Our unit was to be moved to another department. Usually everybody shits themselves when there is a restructure but our team was ecstatic. We had moved out of the profit driven arm of the organisation and into the field of compliance which is our primary function. Since then I've had about as much fun as Leon Cameron at last year's grand final.

The warning lights began to turn when I started getting duties taken away from me. I have always been versatile and have skills in multiple disciplines. Suddenly I was being asked to choose. As someone who is very passionate about my work I found this sudden necessity for choice to be quite confronting. Then in November I had the team leadership taken away from me. It wasn't even clearly explained, more implied. I thought I was stepping aside while a consultant came in to temporarily oversee management of the team. Not so, I was already out. Then there was a meeting with my team to tell them what they decided not to bother telling me, that I was no longer their manger. I was not invited to this meeting.

Christmas came and went, always a horrible time for me due to the death of my father and his birthday around then too. Shovelling dirt on a beloved pet's face at 6.30 in the morning didn't rank as my best ever Christmas morning. Oh well, onwards and upwards back to work REB. At 8.30 on my first day back I was called in to the office where I was told I was to be taken off a project because my work was late and that it wasn't up to standard. My work was sent for review days before project deadlines and I never got a straight answer as to what exactly was wrong with my work. Seeing as I have been writing training documentation for 15 years I suspected a personal angle to be involved in what should have been a business decision.

For the next two months I had to endure humiliation and bullying as our new consultant opted to consult with the most junior member of the team at the expense of his more senior colleagues. Here I was, 53 with 15 years experience and a Degree doing data entry while the young chap was writing work instructions. I even received an email from this consultant saying that writing was not my strength. This person was my new supervisor, something else the organisation neglected to tell me. So here is this person who obviously doesn't rate me, making evaluations to my department about what our new structure should look like.

Then happy days the organisation worked out the project manager wasn't a people person and disappeared faster than Warner in England. My hopes soared...maybe everything is going to be cool after all. Our team spilled the beans to our manager about the bullshit that was going on and she was shocked. Then the PD news filtered out and straight away we Unioned up. The restructure got knocked back because the new PDs went over everyone's heads. Union to the rescue. Delay, delay, delay with daily calendar appointments.....you'd go to work, is this the day? Is this day? Are they going to use Vaseline?

Last Tuesday the day finally arrived. It was a great result for everyone in the team but I got shafted. Everyone got bumped up a level but I got bumped down a level. Not tooting my own horn here but I know more than anyone in that team, I made it my business to know. They couldn't cut my pay but they can put you on something called Salary maintenance. Salary maintenance means I get paid at my current rate but I won't get a CPI pay rise for years until my new level 'catches up' to my current salary. Not what you want for wage or your super at 53.

After the meeting I met with a delegate and my union rep. I was told the original PDs were ****** for everyone and that the Union were aiming to keep everyone in a job which they managed to do. I also got told that they were going to give me the arse. If it wasn't for my Union I was gone. I was close to breaking all meeting but when I heard that my reward for learning more and putting up my hand to lead the team was a DCM. I felt worthless, I was devasted. I knew this was coming but when the consultant left my spirits were lifted only to be emphatically crushed later.

My union guy talked about something called OSD Organisational Stress Disorder and a middle aged middle management type was at risk. Not sleeping? Tick, not interested in things you normally love, tick, tick, tick. I was at risk. Then came the question "have you had any suicidal thoughts" and my inability to answer the question was all the answers required. All,if a sudden, these thoughts could not be compartmentalised and rationalised. Shit just got real.

Somehow I made it through the meetings and went outside and completely broke down. Everything just crashed down on me at once like a tube at Rip Curl BANG. I'm in the washing machine and I'd never felt so sick in my life. I couldn't hold my head up. I went into work the next day and my supervisor said "what are you doing here". On the way out I got help. EAP, HR, Mental Health first aid officer, and a GP appointment. I'm seeing a shrink in a few weeks and I've reached out to many people. I'm not about to implement a permanent solution to a temporary problem. I have a mental health plan and I've applied for other jobs as I need to get out of where I am.

Finally, I told my boys why Dad has been at home. They are 17 and 23 but I was honest and explained to them that part if being a man is knowing that asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness. I've been dudded at work, but I still have a job. If I land one of the gigs I'm trying out for, I actually come out in front. I've got more shit to come but I reckon I'm through the worst of it. But the last year or so has been the toughest of my life.

Regards,

REB


**** me, you've really been through the wringer. Believe it or not, you've just made it through to the other side of it.

Just know that it takes real courage to know you're struggling, and to take steps to get the help you need. Furthermore, you've just set a really great example for your boys.

Also, many of us are here for a chat or a shoulder if you need it.
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Re: Are you ok?

Postby Rik E Boy » Tue Mar 10, 2020 9:10 pm

Thanks man. Just felt good writing it out.

regards,

REB
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Re: Are you ok?

Postby Magellan » Tue Mar 10, 2020 9:31 pm

Rik E Boy wrote:I've applied for other jobs as I need to get out of where I am.

Some organisations are simply too ****** in the corporate head to know good people when they have them. You've made the right decision to get out - they don't deserve you, and you sure as hell deserve much better than what they can dish up.

Like FC said, you're heading in the right direction. You'll get there, and the SA Footy team will be right here to make sure.
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Re: Are you ok?

Postby PatowalongaPirate » Tue Mar 10, 2020 9:46 pm

Good luck with the new pathway REB. I’m sure your lads would be proud of their old man.
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Re: Are you ok?

Postby MatteeG » Tue Mar 10, 2020 11:16 pm

Great that you could get that out REB.

I too recently ventured into the world of middle management and it was the absolute pits. I'd never lost sleep about work until this time and started feeling unwell (stomach issues, lack of motivation, actual fear of turning the laptop on). We went from a privately owned large global employer who really looked after/rewarded their staff to a huge public company who merged/absorbed a bunch of other companies and have become all about the almighty $ with scant regard how they get it.

Eventually I spoke to my wife about it and despite bringing some of it up with my then manager the lack of real training/support was obvious. I had to get out of the role at least, if not the company.

I got thrown an internal lifeline through another department and went back to mainly project work which has smashed me for the past 14 months but I still prefer it to the 'keep everyone happy' LM role I had. I also have confidence in knowing I can probably move companies reasonably easy so if this role doesn't quite go how I want I'll have no hesitation in moving.

Good luck with the applications-- if those around you don't appreciate you then I guarantee another mob will.
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Re: Are you ok?

Postby JK » Wed Mar 11, 2020 8:05 am

Good onya for speaking up Reberta. Sounds like it’s been a long road mate which is hopefully starting to turn for the better. All the best mate
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Re: Are you ok?

Postby Wedgie » Wed Mar 11, 2020 8:55 am

Thoughts with ya REB!
Certainly makes me glad I got out of the corporate world a few years ago reading thigs like that.
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Re: Are you ok?

Postby Lightning McQueen » Wed Mar 11, 2020 8:55 am

Rik E Boy wrote:Thanks man. Just felt good writing it out.

regards,

REB

Sometimes that's just what we need mate, I'm no stranger to this sort of shit, I still don't know how I survived my Christmas ordeal, i have no idea how it is still affecting me as I find myself in dark places at times hoping the moment passes briefly so I can get on to what I'm meant to be doing next.

I hope you find peace within yourself and a change of fortune comes your way, you're a good bloke and good things happen to good people, the karma train will pick you up and drop you off at the right station.
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Re: Are you ok?

Postby Dutchy » Wed Mar 11, 2020 1:47 pm

Thats tough REB, nothing worse than not feeling valued when you give absolutely everything, all the best, I reckon you are on the upward curve now.
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Re: Are you ok?

Postby Rik E Boy » Sat Mar 14, 2020 12:51 am

Thanks everyone. Had an interesting meeting with management yesterday. I had them squirming which was good to see. All the while I didn't drop myself in it. A delicate balancing act.

regards,

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Re: Are you ok?

Postby mighty_tiger_79 » Sun Mar 15, 2020 12:06 pm

Rik E Boy wrote:Thanks everyone. Had an interesting meeting with management yesterday. I had them squirming which was good to see. All the while I didn't drop myself in it. A delicate balancing act.

regards,

REB

That's a good result
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Re: Are you ok?

Postby Booney » Fri Mar 20, 2020 11:45 am

This shit is going to weigh a lot of people down. More than ever this is somewhere to let it all out.

It's heavy man, really f*cking heavy at the moment and it's all consuming. This is going to be a time for everyone to stick together.

Family, friends, workmates and this little joint. Let's back each other here.
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Re: Are you ok?

Postby gadj1976 » Fri Mar 20, 2020 11:15 pm

I'm a candidate for losing my job albeit temporarily. But I don't want people to feel sorry for me. I expect a lot of people to lose their income stream permanently which worries me more than my own dilemma.

In my opinion the banks need to pull back. This is the most stressful times I've ever seen and am likely to see. I just hope there is some compassion otherwise we as a society will be in a collective world of pain and grief for goodness knows how long. Given that unemployment will likely go thru the roof, the chances of suicide rates increasing are high in my opinion.

There are no chances of seeking redeployment for those unemployed. For me I have to tough it out. Is it mentally stimulating? No. Sitting at home each day not knowing when the next pay cheque will come thru is horrible. And I'm one of the lucky ones. We need to put our collective arms around each other and make sure we are ok. One in all in as they say.

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Re: Are you ok?

Postby woodublieve12 » Sat Mar 21, 2020 5:45 pm

Probably haven’t noticed but I haven’t been on here much. Honestly I haven’t been ok. Been a mess if I am being completely honest. I am mentally exhausted and I just want things to slow down for a second. Overthinking is literally doing my head in and not to mention anxiety. Got an appointment Friday to speak to my psych. I know I am a good person and I will be ok. But this past couple of weeks has been awful. I couldn’t tell you when the last time I felt “normal” was :(

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Re: Are you ok?

Postby MW » Sat Mar 21, 2020 5:49 pm

woodublieve12 wrote:Probably haven’t noticed but I haven’t been on here much. Honestly I haven’t been ok. Been a mess if I am being completely honest. I am mentally exhausted and I just want things to slow down for a second. Overthinking is literally doing my head in and not to mention anxiety. Got an appointment Friday to speak to my psych. I know I am a good person and I will be ok. But this past couple of weeks has been awful. I couldn’t tell you when the last time I felt “normal” was :(

My two beautiful girls are my rocks.


I had noticed mate. Stay strong
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Re: Are you ok?

Postby whufc » Sat Mar 21, 2020 5:49 pm

woodublieve12 wrote:Probably haven’t noticed but I haven’t been on here much. Honestly I haven’t been ok. Been a mess if I am being completely honest. I am mentally exhausted and I just want things to slow down for a second. Overthinking is literally doing my head in and not to mention anxiety. Got an appointment Friday to speak to my psych. I know I am a good person and I will be ok. But this past couple of weeks has been awful. I couldn’t tell you when the last time I felt “normal” was :(

My two beautiful girls are my rocks.


Great news that your seeing a professional, that’s the best step.

In the mean time surround yourself with people you love and try and find a bit of time for things that you enjoy.

If you ever want to chat only a message away.
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Re: Are you ok?

Postby Grenville » Sat Mar 21, 2020 5:54 pm

woodublieve12 wrote:Probably haven’t noticed but I haven’t been on here much. Honestly I haven’t been ok. Been a mess if I am being completely honest. I am mentally exhausted and I just want things to slow down for a second. Overthinking is literally doing my head in and not to mention anxiety. Got an appointment Friday to speak to my psych. I know I am a good person and I will be ok. But this past couple of weeks has been awful. I couldn’t tell you when the last time I felt “normal” was :(

My two beautiful girls are my rocks.


If you need to vent lad this is the perfect forum. I think the past has shown on here that when the chips are down people are decent and compassionate. Hope you come out of it ok.
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