HAPPY AUSTRALIA DAY

[redden whites]

Time for some chin music SMAC

[MagicKiwi]

There is no day called NZ Day across the ditch. It's called Waitangi Day and celebrates the day a treaty was signed between the English and the Maori in order that they stop bashing the living daylights out of each other and get on with it. The poms were there quite some time before this auspicious event with quite a few lives lost. So the treaty was signed and that's the day they celebrate.

I love Australia Day that I can go to the cricket at Adelaide Oval in the morning and the Triple J's Hottest 100 Australia Day Barbie in the afternoon. Speaking of backyard cricket, I'm clearly getting too old. I have pulled up sore* and have found it very hard getting around the last few days FFS. I'll have to go in training before next year.

[Psyber]

I was impressed with the Indian girl I mentioned earlier in this thread.

At age 17 she did a strenuous 4 hour dance programme of 8 items to rapid and varying rhythms, with only a 20 minute half-time break, and only enough time to change costumes between items.

I wonder how many footballers could sustain that level of continuous activity.

[LBT]

There is no day called NZ Day across the ditch. It's called Waitangi Day and celebrates the day a treaty was signed between the English and the Maori in order that they stop bashing the living daylights out of each other and get on with it. The poms were there quite some time before this auspicious event with quite a few lives lost. So the treaty was signed and that's the day they celebrate.

I love Australia Day that I can go to the cricket at Adelaide Oval in the morning and the Triple J's Hottest 100 Australia Day Barbie in the afternoon. Speaking of backyard cricket, I'm clearly getting too old. I have pulled up sore* and have found it very hard[*] getting around the last few days FFS. I'll have to go in training before next year.

[Footy Chick]

You know when you're Australian when.... ( I fully agree with no.23 btw )


1. You know the meaning of the word "girt".
2. You believe that stubbies can be either drunk or worn.
3. You think it's normal to have a leader called Kevin.
4. You waddle when you walk due to the 53 expired petrol discount vouchers stuffed in your wallet or purse.
5. You've made a bong out of your garden hose rather than use it for something illegal such as watering the garden.
6. You believe it is appropriate to put a rubber in your son's pencil case when he first attends school.
7. When you hear that an American "roots for his team" you wonder how often and with whom.
8. You understand that the phrase "a group of women wearing black thongs" refers to footwear and may be less alluring than it sounds.
9. You pronounce Melbourne as "Mel-bin".
10. You pronounce Penrith as "Pen-riff".
11. You believe the "l" in the word "Australia" is optional.
12. You can translate: "Dazza and Shazza played Acca Dacca on the way to Maccas."
13. You believe it makes perfect sense for a nation to decorate its highways with large fibreglass bananas, prawns and sheep.
14. You call your best friend "a total bastard" but someone you really, truly despise is just "a bit of a bastard".
15. You think "Woolloomooloo" is a perfectly reasonable name for a place.
16. You're secretly proud of our killer wildlife.
17. You believe it makes sense for a country to have a $1 coin that's twice as big as its $2 coin.
18. You understand that "Wagga Wagga" can be abbreviated to "Wagga" but "Woy Woy" can't be called "Woy".
19. You believe that cooked-down axlegrease makes a good breakfast spread.
20. You believe all famous Kiwis are actually Australian, until they stuff up, at which point they again become Kiwis.
21. Hamburger. Beetroot. Of course.
22. You know that certain words must, by law, be shouted out during any rendition of the Angels' song Am I Ever Gonna See Your Face Again.
23. You believe, as an article of faith, that the confectionary known as the Wagon Wheel has become smaller with every passing year.
24. You still don't get why the "Labor" in "Australian Labor Party" is not spelt with a "u".

25. You wear ugh boots outside the house.
26. You believe, as an article of faith, that every important discovery in the world was made by an Australian but then sold off to the Yanks for a pittance.
27. You believe that the more you shorten someone's name the more you like them.
28. Whatever your linguistic skills, you find yourself able to order takeaway fluently in every Asian language.
29. You understand that "excuse me" can sound rude, while "scuse me" is always polite.
30. You know what it's like to swallow a fly, on occasion via your nose.
31. You understand that "you" has a plural and that it's "youse".
32. You know it's not summer until the steering wheel is too hot to handle.
33. Your biggest family argument over the summer concerned the rules for beach cricket.
34. You shake your head in horror when companies try to market what they call "Anzac cookies".
35. You still think of Kylie as "that girl off Neighbours".
36. When returning home from overseas, you expect to be brutally strip-searched by Customs - just in case you're trying to sneak in fruit.
37. You believe the phrase "smart casual" refers to a pair of black tracky-daks, suitably laundered.
38. You understand that all train timetables are works of fiction.
39. When working on a bar, you understand male customers will feel the need to offer an excuse whenever they order low-alcohol beer.
40. You get choked up with emotion by the first verse of the national anthem and then have trouble remembering the second.
41. You find yourself ignorant of nearly all the facts deemed essential in the government's new test for migrants.
42. You know, whatever the tourist books say, that no one says "cobber".
43. And you will immediately forward this list to other Australians, here and overseas, realising that only they will understand.
Happy Australia Day.

[Punk Rooster]

20 is my favourite (& dead true )
21- why the f**k do I have to ask for Beetroot on my steak sanga w/lot???
or if I don't, some homo has put a f**kin pineapple ring of all things- why?

My proposal-
forgetting to, or not putting beetroot on a steak sandwich/hamburger with the lot:
1st Offence- 7 years jail & 50 cuts of the lash
2nd Offence- Banned from working in/running/or bring a partner in any business, followed by a good whipping, then 10 years jail.

putting a pineapple ring on the above gourmet item-
1st offence- gallows (deportation if he's a "good bloke")

In fact, instead of learning "Advance Australia Fair", migrants must be able to recite in good plain english the correct ingredients for a Steak Sandwich/Hamburger with the lot, defined as:

Steak (or beef patty)
cheese
bacon
tomato sauce/pepper/salt
egg (cooked all the way through, unless requested sunny side up)
tomato
lettuce
beetroot
onion (cooked, not raw...)
the bread should be toasted (for steak sanga's, buns for burger's)
do not under any circumstances place the work of art in the microwave after cooking!

[JK]

putting a pineapple ring on the above gourmet item-
1st offence- gallows (deportation if he's a "good bloke")

Well that seems to work if it was a famous Kiwi who made the stuff up

[smac]

I reckon you have that recipe spot on Punky, cannot add or subtract from that at all.